Another World For Flawless
by thecautionarytale
Summary: The sequal to Another World For Beautiful. Clove has been trying to move on from the unfortunate events of last years hunger games, but Catos not taking it as well. But when the Capitol forces them together again, could the spark still be there?
1. Bittersweet December

**So here's the sequal to Another World For Beautiful, I hope ya'll like it and please review!**

****Chapter 1

Bittersweet December

I started to slice the tomatoes. I was cooking dinner. Yes, over the past couple of months, I had learned to cook. But my education was limited to pasta and carb loaded foods, seeing as that's all I would ever need. I didn't have to worry about training anymore, I was free to be fat. Having that big knife in my hand felt so familiar, so natural, so... Right. Impulsively, I picked it up and positioned it, preparing to throw it. I was about to throw it at the door when it opened abruptly. I didn't even think to hide the knife.

"Clove! Why the hell are you pointing a knife at me!?" Sam yelled, walking in. As she came in, she proceeded to let in several flurries of snow.

"Close the door goddammit it's cold!" I lowered the knife.

"I've got you your lemon juice" she held up the bottle. "I don't understand why you still insist on lemon juice on your pasta. If you put red sauce on it, it's already acidic enough."

"Because, dear Sam" I pointed the knife back at her, "I live on the edge"

"The hell you do" she pushed the knife away. "When's dinner gonna be ready? I'm hungry" she sat down on the plush couch, placing her hands behind her head.

"Patience young grasshopper" I joked.

The past few months with Sam had been great. She had kept me sane the whole time, not without the occasional nightmares. But having her around was such a relief. I'd like to believe that having her around was just enough, but I still needed a male figure to be around; to confide in. And I had one. You'll meet him soon enough.

"Clove?" I heard three hard knocks on the door. I ran to Sam and helped her get up, pushing her through the hallways.

"Why are you even dating that bastard, he's just a no good son of a-" she started to say as I pushed her in the closet.

"Shove it. I'll make sure he doesn't stay too late, but be quiet until then. Here." I tossed her one of the Capitol gadgets Herb had sent me. "Keep yourself entertained" she looked at the gadget with the expression of oh, shiny.

"Clove!" He shouted again.

"I'm coming, calm down!" I opened the door. And there he stood; my newest boyfriend. His name was Ashton Simmons. He was 6'0" and tan for a resident of District two. But on that day his cheeks and nose were rosy red from being outside, and his buff arms had goosebumps all down them. He pushed past me and into the house. "Why don't you ever wear a jacket?" I asked, closing the door.

"I'm too hot to wear a jacket" modest, that was something he wasn't. He picked up the lid from one of the pots. "What's for dinner?"

"Pasta"

"When are ya gonna learn to cook something else?" I pushed past him to the pot so I could stir it.

"When I get tired of it" he yanked my hair and pulled me close, making sure I heard his words.

"Dot talk to me like hat, little bitch" he dropped me on the ground and in the process, spilled the boiling pot of water on me.

People always say you'll end up marrying someone like your father. I never thought I'd be lonely enough to believe them.

**I know it was short but it packs a lot of info so PLEASE REVIEW and if you don't understand who Sam is, see the first story Another World For beautiful **


	2. Random

**Hey everybody, here's le next chapter PLEASE REVIEW**

****Chapter 2

Random

"Clove!" Sam called through the house. I was in the bathroom again, trying to clean up the latest bruises on my face from Ashton. She always got really worked up when she saw them.  
"In here!" I yelled, making sure to cover my eye with a bit more makeup.  
"One thing I've noticed is ever since you got back from the Capitol, you spend a lot of time in the bathroom doing your makeup." She leaned in the doorway and I shrugged in reply. "Here" she smiled, thinking it would be funny if she smeared her hands across her face, wiping away the freshly applied makeup.  
"Sam! What the hell!" I cupped my face, but it was too late. She caught my hand and pulled it away from my face.  
"Clove" her voice quivered, but I was speechless. I wasn't sure what to tell her. "Why do you let him do this to you?" She let go of my hand and I busied myself with washing off the makeup. There was no point anymore.  
"I-" I took a long look at myself in the mirror. "I don't know."  
"We'll if you don't know, why don't you try and get rid of him! There's obviously some reason you stay with him!"  
"I'm lonely, godammit!" I turned to her angrily. "His abuse makes me feel less lonely"  
"Well that's just fucked up. That's no reason for him to hurt you" I shrugged again, pushing past her and into my bedroom. "Have you talked to Cato lately?" I stopped dead in my tracks. We never talked about Cato. I had made a rule of it, but apparently she was trying to figure me out at that moment, so I guess she felt obliged to test me.  
"No" I answered simply.  
"Do you plan on it. You're gonna be with him again in a month for the Victor's tour you know. Might as well patch up things"  
"Patch up what things? If you think we're getting back together, think again. That ship sailed a long time a go."  
"You were just so happy-"  
"I don't want to talk about Cato, okay?"  
"Well when you decide to tell me the truth, call me" she picked up her jacket and tossed an envelope on my bed before leaving. When she left, I picked up the envelope. It was addressed to me from District 4, and inside I found a letter.  
Dear Clove,  
I know you're probably feeling really lonely right now, with the games being over and whatnot. I can relate too, when I won my games I felt really alone. But I can't Imagine what it's like without either parents or a boyfriend to turn to. I know we've only met once or twice, but I was wondering if you wanted to come visit me in District four. I know you've never been and I figured being around your moms family would be a good way to get away from all the craziness. Plus, after my games I had no idea what to do with my life. I can only imagine you're feeling the same way; no longer going to training and stuff. So send me back a letter so I can get a train arranged. Oh, and feel free to bring... Anyone you want to.  
-Your Cousin, Annie Cresta  
It was nice to hear from her. The only time I had met her was my mother's funeral, but other than that Annie and I had never gotten the chance to get to know each other. I actually hadn't seen her since I was like seven, but judging from the picture Finnick had shown me before last years games, Annie was my age.  
An invitation to district four. Well that was a bit random. But it seemed fitting; I'd lost both parents and my mothers side of the family wants me to visit. I guess that's just a really human thing to do, get support from family, so I sat down and wrote back to Annie. I would go to District four. I would bring Sam. I would meet my mother's family.

* * *

I double checked that I had most of my things. It wouldn't really matter if I didn't have everything, because by now I could buy things that I needed on the spot. At about four in the morning, I met Sam at the train station. The place gave me the creeps, reminding me of the games, my dad, not to mention Cato. "You okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine" I smiled slightly. By then, Sam and I had resolved our dispute. I guess we had fights like that a lot, but always resolved them a couple days later. Maybe all friends had those. I was still trying to figure out the whole friendship thing.

The train pulled up slowly; eerily almost. Like a ghost from last year's games returning back to the present. Sam almost had to take my hand and lead me on the train, I was frozen in place. But I eventually found myself on the train, admiring the interior.  
No matter how many times I had been to the Capitol, the Capitol smell always got me. It was like a wall of perfume and the smell of chalk hitting you in the face. "No fucking way" Sam, obviously taken aback by all of the food, ran forward and started to eat.  
"What? I never get that reaction when I cook diner?"  
"But... They have sweets!" She picked up some sort of powdered pastry. "You're such a health nut" she too a bite. "You need to learn this recipe, cause is shit is good"  
"Whatever" I laughed at her casualty. It was almost weird being on the train without seeing Brutus or Enobaria or... Never mind.  
Brutus and Enobaria! I almost forgot! Well, over the past couple months, they've both returned to their normal district two lives, working at the training center, and pretending to hate eachother when I really know that they love eachother. How I know? Well I just see the way they look at eachother.

* * *

I was in the middle of catching up on the latest Captiol news when the train came to a stop. "We're here!" Sam exclaimed, peering out of the window. She turned around and looked at me closely. "You ready?"

"Yeah" I nodded, trying to reassure myself more than her. We picked up our bags that we had so carelessly dropped on the ground and went to the door.  
When's he door opened, I was instantly blinded by the sun, which gave me a mini heart attack because the last time that happened, I was in the hunger games. When my eyes adjusted, I saw that the justice building looked exactly like the one back home, that was a bit of a relief.  
"Clove!" I heard a voice and was suddenly hit by a hug. When I came to, I noticed the person hugging me was short, with long brown hair. Annie.  
"Hey Annie. Good to see you too" I hadn't expected such an upfront greeting. She hooked her arm into mine and lead me off down the road.  
"C'mon Sam" I called to her. As we walked, I noticed recourring patterns; sand, docks, boat, sand.  
"Welcome to District four" Annie smiled, stepping over a rope as we walked down the sidewalk. I looked all around me, noticing the fisherman and cute side shops, but the biggest thing I noticed was the clear blue ocean. The only bodies of water I had ever encountered were the cold lakes up in District two, but I had never seen the ocean.  
We reached a large, three story orange house that had its own sliver of beach. Annie led us inside and into a small guest room with two beds where we put our stuff down. "Where are your parents?"  
"They're out fishing, you won't get to see them until tomorrow"  
"So what are we supposed to do now" Sam asked rudely.  
"We'll, some of my friends are eager to meet you so I put together a beach bonfire, if that's okay with you guys. I mean, as long as you're not too tired."  
"I'm always up for a good party" I smiled.  
"Great"

* * *

I found the bonfire much less interesting than I had anticipated it being. The district two parties were always raves with glow sticks and alcohol and people pretending they weren't doing drugs in the corner. This district four party was just a get together literally a time when people were called together and we sat and talked.  
At the beginning of the party, Annie would lead me around, introducing me to all of her friends. But halfway through, her boyfriend showed up with his buddies. Finnick. I remembered him form the games, he seemed to remember me to. H was a bit surprised to see me.  
"Clove! What are you doing down in district four?"  
"Annie invited me"  
"We're related" she said, looking up at Finnick with those big green eyes.  
"Nice" he smiled. "It's great to see you're doing good"  
"Ey Fin!" One of his friends called from the truck they had driven up in.  
"Be right back, got to get the keg" okay so district four-ers weren't total goody two shoes. At least they had alcohol. While Finnick and Annie went off to help, I did my best to find Sam. She was standing by the fire, twirling a price of her hair as a guy was talking to her. Typical.  
"Hey, you're Clove, right?" Someone said.  
"Um, yeah" I turned around and was met face to face with a tall boy. He had black hair and freckles, not to mention those icy blue eyes that reminded me of Cato's.  
"Congratulations on the games"  
"O thanks" normally when people said that, I took it literally. Like someone said congratulations on not dying, you're cool. It i didn't want to be rude, and in that moment, I wasn't thinking. Just staring in his blue eyes.  
"I'm Jackson" he outstretched his hand.  
"I'm still Clove" I laughed, shaking his hand.  
"Can I get you a drink?" It was a bit more of a command rather than a question. He walked over to the keg and filled a cup for me. When he returned, he handed me the cup gingerly. I subconsciously downed it, refusing to look away from his eyes. "Um" he laughed. "Do you want mine?" I nodded, taking the cup and finishing off that one. "Yeah, okay. I'm going to cut you off officially." I giggled slightly. His face relaxed a bit. "You want to take a walk? I'd love to learn mor about you"  
"Sure" he hooked his arm in mine, I guess that's what all district four-ers did, and led me down the beach, along the water. Somewhere along he way, I found my lips planted on his.  
Now, don't get me wrong It was nice to kiss someone other than Cato, but Jackson was a terrible kisser. NOt to mention that my incentive for kissing him was probably because his eyes reminded me so much of Catos.  
We were in the sand, and he kept pushing farther and father. I was too drunk to stop him and he pushed me down in the sand, crawling on top of me. "Clove?" I turned my head and saw a dark silhouette against the moon. I finally pushed Jackson off of me and looked closer. It was a tall boy, who probably once was muscular. Probably not as skinny, but it seemed as though he had abused drugs and alcohol and now his body was ten years older than he really was. His blonde hair was a lot longer and flopped to one side.  
"What are you doing here?"  
"Finnick's my half brother" he said.  
"Are you fucking with me?"  
"Nope" he laughed slightly, running his hands through his hair.  
"Whatever dude, you can have her" Jackson stood up and stomped off.  
The silhouette was Cato. What are the odds.

**PLEASE REVIEW**


	3. Crank

**This week sucks because a girl who likes my ex boyfriend who I'm friends with is spreading rumors about me and I heard my grandma has cancer. Fml. Sorry this chapter sucks.**

****Chapter 3

Crank

"Well" Cato crossed his arms across his chest. "That was awkward" he motioned to Jackson who had left abruptly.  
"No shit" I stood up, brushing off my hands. I did my best to stomp off back to the fire, but almost fell. I guess I was a bit more tipsy than I had suspected. And of course, Cato caught me.  
"And how much have you had to drink? The party just started!" Cato forced a smile, making sure I was stable and then backing away, making sure he had space. I walked towards the fire, knowing that Cato was following a couple yards behind, not daring to stand next to me.  
I passed Sam on the way, who gave me a wild glance when she saw Cato. Almost as if to say, wow. That WOULD happen. I knew exactly what she meant. I was not expecting to see him at all.  
Cato finally detached, walking over to Finnick's friends who were sitting on the tailgate of the truck. I resulted to sitting by the fire alone. Wow. I'm cool, I thought. At first, I was contemplating going to talk to Finnick's friends by Cato. I mean, if Cato got along so hem, I would, right? Well I changed my mind when I glanced in there direction.  
Cato's face was expressionless, his mouth in a straight line. And I could see why. He was nonce treating on the needle in his arm.  
Sure, District two teenagers did drugs every once in a while, but I had never tried them, and as far as I knew Cato hadn't either, but apparently he had. His skin was grayer, his blue eyes dulled, his hair uncut, his face scraggly, and his cheeks sunken in. He was definitely abuseing harmful substances.  
Eventually, Sam came and found me, told me all about her "friend" Alex. About twelve o'clock, the party split into two different groups. One group were the jocks, the people with a reputation, the ones that had things to do the next day. The other group was the outcasts, the druggies (including Cato and Finnick's friends. Annie and Finnick had snuck off earlier), and ultimately me. Alex was going with the group, Sam wanted to go with Alex and wanted me to come with her. So I was being drug along. The group migrated down the road, yelling drunk slurs and singing loudly. We finally reached a small side shop that appeared closed, but the back door was open. We all snuck in and then proceeded downstairs.  
Downstairs, we found a rave, a lot more like the District two parties. The flashing lights, the thumping music. I felt home.  
Sam and I were dancing with Alex, who turned out to be a pretty cool guy. He was nice and caring, unlike the rest of the people we were with. I was having a good time, up until something went wrong, as it always does.  
We were dancing, but even though I could feel every vibration through the floor from the music, I felt a thud against the ground. And not far away was Cato, passed out on the dusty wooden floor.  
"Cato?" I rushed over. I guess my instincts were kicking in. Partially because half the people around him were too stoned to even call for help. I knelt by his side and placed two finger against his cordial artery. There was a pulse. A distinct thump. I noticed the needle was still stuck in his arm. A drug overdose. Well that was evident. "Sam! Get some help!" I yelled. She couldn't hear me. Thump. His pulse was slowing.  
"Someone! Help!" No one heard me. They were too high. I felt like I was drowning in the sea of people. "Help me godammit!"  
His heart gave a pitiful  
Thump  
Thump  
t-h-u-m-p.  
**REVIEWS=LOVE**


	4. Uprising of The Heart

**People are still spreading rumors about me... fml. I hate school right now**

****Chapter 4

Uprising of The Heart

"Cato!" I shook him violently, but his eyes refused to open. I yelled desperately to the people around me, but no one heard me. "Get and ambulance! Now!" But instead of someone obliging, a phone dropped from someone's pocket and onto the ground. The stoner didn't notice. I called the hospital, typing the number in furiously.

"I need an ambulance! Now!" I screamed to the phone. I hung up before the person could reply. They could trace my call, they would find us. I plucked the needle out of his arm, still half full with drugs. "Dammit Cato" my voice broke slightly and tears started to escape my eyes. I just sat there, unsure of what to do.

But then the EMS came in, pushing through the crowds and finally reaching Cato. And without any warning, they whisked him away. I almost didn't notice when they took him, but when I turned around, he was being carried away on a gurney. I was running after the gurney but I obviously reached the door at the wrong time, because the police met me by the door. And I'm sure the first thing they saw was the needle in my hand.

* * *

I looked closely at myself in the mirror. I was wearing my white cuttoffs and black tank top. I actually had looked decent when I had left the house, but by now I was a mess. My skin was freckled with a rainbow of glow in the dark paint, not to mention the blue glow in the dark handprint on my ass (that I dont remember getting). Dirt was alll over my knees from kneeling on the ground, and I still had that stupid glow in the dark crow on my head. I tore the crown off and threw it into the sink.

I was lucky enough that the police had heard me out and let me go, but now I was parading around a hospital looking like an idiot with a crown and a blue ass. Maybe I was just paranoid, but I felt like everyone waas watching. Every nurse, every patient that passed me looked at me with the expression _what are you doing here? you're not even dating! _BUt it couldn't be possible. I didn't know any of them.

But I was doing the right thing, wasn't I? I mean, I was the only one sober enough to call an ambulance.

I finally convinced myself go out of the bathroom. What if Cato needed me? I opened the door, but the first thing I saw made my skin tingle. The doctors were hovering frantically over Cato. And one of them pulled out the paddles. "Clear" he muttered, and Cato's body jolted up, but fell limp again.

The doctor tried again, to no avail. The doctor did one last time, and when Cato's body fell limp, my heart hit the floor. I crumpled on the cold hard ground of the hospital. After all we had been through, he would leave this world of a drug overdose. I buried my face in my hands. I guess people weren't used to seeing a victor breaking down i the middle of a hospital, because people gave me weird glances as they passed. But crying is a human emotion. And, afterall, I'm human.

I took a quivering breath, but I stopped suddenly. Just stopped breathing. Just to hear the stark silence. But something was masking the silence. A faint _beep beep beep. _I pulled my hands away from my face, and there, struggling against the doctor's grasp, was an alive Cato. I mean, sure, he looked about ready to kill the doctors, but he was alive.

**I know all these chapters have been super super short. ****_Do you guys prefer the short chapters ive been doing? or the ones I had in the first story?_**** if the second choice, I might rewrite some of these chapters so theyre longer. I NEED FEEDBACK ASAP**


	5. Why

**Merry Christmas to my lovely readers! Well i know I've been saying n this authors note a lot lately "fml" and I have learned to accept the fact that this girl is spreading rumors about me, because my ex is happy either way, and I felt bad hurting him after I broke up. Fate has a funny way of laying things out for us.**

****Chapter 5

Why

"Let go of me goddammit!" Cato bellowed, the vein in his neck throbbing. There were about four doctors, pinning his forearms to the bed, but they wouldn't be able to hold him much longer. I scrambled up from the floor and ran into the room. When I ran into the room, Cato looked up at me, dumbstruck. "Clove?" he muttered, but at the same time he saw me, the doctors stuck a needle in his arm, causing him to pass out.

I angrily turned to the doctor. "Really? Was that necessary?" I spoke through my teeth. "He stopped! That's no reason to sedate the guy! What would you do if one minute you were dead on the floor of a club and woke up in a fucking hospital?" the doctor refused to look in my eyes. I suppose some people were afraid of me, seeing as I had won the Hunger Games. I had killed many-a-people. But this doctor was being a coward.

But I saw just in time why he was looking down. Standing at the door was a Capitol attendant I had never seen before, with a camera in his hand. He was about to take a picture. I could already see the headlines: "**Clove Threatens The Very Doctor That Saved Her Partners Life**" I launched myself across the room and knocked the camera from his hands. The last thing I needed was more shit about me in the Capitol news. Everybody in the Capitol already hated me enough for breaking Cato's heart. Could they not see that the boy I loved tried to kill me!?

The camera hit the floor with a satisfying shatter and I smiled to myself. But the Capitol attendant's eyes blazed with anger. Before he could say anything, Sam, Alex, Finnick, and Annie came in. Sam and Alex were both covered in glow in the dark paint like I had been, and Finnick and Annie were all sandy. Probably from rolling around in the sand together, I chuckled to myself.

"Is everything okay? Is he alive?" Annie was the first to speak, barging into the room and to the monitor. She let out a relieved sigh when the monitor showed her he was breathing. Alex and Sam stepped in, towards me.

"I'm sorry I couldn't help you" Sam looked genuinely guilty.

"It's not your fault, you couldn't hear me. Besides, if I had taken the time to get you two, he probably wouldn't have lived." Sam nodded. Finnick was the last to step in. He sat on Cato's bed and examined his arm. There was a tiny speck of a hole where he had impaled himself with the needle.

"I told him to stop." Finnick's voice cracked. "I tried to help him. But he said it hurt to much to think anymore" I don't think Finnick meant to say that to make me feel guilty, but it hit my heart like a block of wood. I took the liberty of sitting down before I fell again.

* * *

Cato wasn't supposed to wake up from the sedation until the next day, so he was forced to stay behind. "I should get home and talk to dad about this" Finnick said. He gave Annie one last hug and kissed her forehead lightly before padding out of the room.

"I should get going too" Alex said to Sam. They just stood there, fingers intertwined. He showed no signs of wanting to leave, but he had to. He leaned closer to kiss her, but she placed a finger on his lips. I could tell she didn't want him to kiss her around me or Annie. She was sometimes modest like that, so she lead him out of the room.

Annie stood across the room, propped up on the wall and peered at her watch. "It's three in the morning. Clove. Do you want to go home?"

"No. I think I should- uh- stay" I replied .

"Do you want me to bring you any food or anything?"

"No, I'm not hungry" I said plainly. She nodded and left to go get Sam and to go home. Before she officially left, she turned back and said "Get some sleep, Clove. He's not going anywhere"

She was right. I was extremely tired and it was a relief that everything was going to be okay. For the time being at least. I tried to figure out where I was going to sleep. The chair I was sitting in was just a crappy metal one, the floor was too cold. I stood up, and for a moment, considered climbing into that hospital bed with Cato. No, I couldn't possibly do that. So instead, I went to the vending machine to get myself some food.

* * *

I woke up in a lounge chair in the lobby of the hospital. The sun streaming through the thin curtains made my eyes sting, but I wasn't worried about that. I wanted to make sure he was really alive. I ran to the hospital room, just in time, because he was just waking up and a nurse was trying to get him to eat food. He pushed it away and she frowned, handing me the food. "here, you do it" she said menacingly. Cato just sat there, wide eyed.

"Hi" I said.

"Hey" he rubbed the back of his neck.

"Feelin' okay?" he nodded in reply blinking a couple times. "What happened last night?" I explained to him the whole story. He didn't move one bit as I was talking. I'm not even sure if he blinked, but finally I finished. "Can I have the food now?" he asked, rubbing his stomach which made a grumbling sound. He was acting like a four year old, but I handed him the food anyway, which he scarfed down.

"Must've been good. You finished it within a couple minutes. New record! Level up" I joked. He just gave a half hearted smile. I could tell he was embarrassed that I was the one to save him from his near death experience. "So Cato, riddle me this. Why exactly did you start drugs" I needed to hear the truth, but he just shook his head in protest. "C'mon. You tell me this, you can ask me any question in the world and I will answer honestly" apparently it was enough to get his attention.

"Well mostly because of the nightmares I had. I was trying to stop them."

"What were the dreams about?" wow. That was a stupid question, I told myself. I knew the answer was going to be about all the death and horror in the arena or something like that, but i still listened closely.

"Some were about Timmy. I should have never let my anger get the best of me and my subconscious is never going to let me forget it. Some were about seeing those mutts." Pain flashed behind his stormy eyes. "Most were about loosing you"

**REVIEWS REVIEWS REVIEWS! I tried to make this one longer. And if you guys want to read some of the poetry and other writing I do, go to my writing blog. **** .com**


	6. Dumbstruck

**This'll probably be the last chapter I'll write for a week or so. I'll be back with internet connection on new years, but i rpobably wont post a chapter that night.**

****Chapter 6

Dumbstruck

There was a long, awkward silence where Cato just stared at his hands and I gaped at him. I'm not exactly sure how long I stood there, staring, but he started to get uncomfortable because he glanced up at me and coughed. I could tell he didn't know what to say, and I was about to say something when a nurse walked in with Finnick.

"Hey man" Finnick walked up to Cato and sat on his bed. "How ya feelin'?"

"I've been better" his voice broke.

"Oh, Clove! Were you here all night?" FInnick noticed me standing there, dumbstruck.

"Y-yeah. I... I um should get back to Annie's." Finnick nodded, his eyes told me _Yeah that's probably a good idea._ And, as if on cue, a tall muscular man barged in, probably Cato's father, and he was raging. I took the liberty of slipping past him before he recognized me and walked out onto the street of district four. I wandered for a bit along the beach, but I finally came to the familiar back side of Annie's house and I walked into the house, straight into the kitchen.

"Clove!" Annie's parents exclaimed together, their faces filled with joy. "It's so good to see you" Annie's mom hugged me closely.

"You too!" I did my best to sound enthused, but my mind was still spinning from the hospital, so much so that you would think _I_ was the one who almost died of a drug overdose. I probably looked like it too, bloodshot eyes and dark circles under my eyes. What a great way to make an impression on Annie's parents.

"You look exhausted, why don't you head up to Annie's room? Her and Sam are up there right now." I nodded and sauntered up the stairs and into Annie's room.

Annie was sprawled across her bed, furiously typing on her phone, and Sam was sitting on thee floor, doing the same. When Annie finally noticed me, she quickly sat up. "Clove! You're here! How's-" she stopped herself and took a long look at my face. "What's wrong?" she asked, and I replied telling both of them the long story of what Cato told me.

* * *

After a couple days of sitting lazily on the beach and going on bike rides with Annie through district four, it was time for me and Sam to go back. We were at the train station and Finnick and Annie were standing in each other's arms as they said goodbye, but little did know Finnick had a not-so-fun surprise for us.

"Hey Clove. I know it's kind of weird by asking this, but can you take Cato with you? I know he needs to be in District two for the victor's tour soon and I don't really have anyone that can take him."

"Uh..."

"Yes, we can" Sam mumbled, not really paying attention because she was too busy with Alex.

"Sam!"

"What?!" she snapped her head towards me. "C'mon it's the least we can do for Finnick and Annie since they gave us such good hospitality! It wont bet that big of an issue!"

"Whatever" I rolled my eyes at her.

"Cato!" Finnick yelled, and Cato stepped out of Finnick's car, carrying his small bag. "If you could check on him every once in a while that'd be great. And he needs to take one of these every five hours" Finnick handed me a bottle of pills. What was I!? A baby sitter? _Apparently,_ because now I was being stuck with taking care of Sam _and _Cato. He shuffled over to Finnick. "Stay sober Cato. We don't need another one of these episodes." Finnick shook Cato's hand firmly.

Cato looked in my direction, but I averted my eyes. "I will, Finn. I promise. And you two don't have too much fun" he looked between Finnick and Annie who just smiled at each other.

"It was really nice to see you Cato" Annie hugged Cato, and then me. "You too Clove, and I hope things work out so you're happier." she forced a smile.

"Thanks Annie. Nice to see you Finn"" I called as I walked away slowly. "Hey lovebirds!" I yelled at Sam and Alex who were rubbing noses and whispering to each other. Sam looked up at me with her big brown eyes, almost like _Can we keep him?_ "We've got to go, Sam." Sam gave Alex one last kiss before hurrying onto the train.

* * *

The train ride was virtually painless. Cato slept most the time and Sam just dramatically looked out the window, but I was glad to reach district two, where people actually spoke. When the train door opened, flurries of snow flooded the floor of the cart.

I clapped in front of Cato's face, "Wake up! We're here" I shouted. He almost kicked me form being startled, but he rubbed his eyes instead and stood up. We walked in silence, trudging through the snow. "Let me stop by my house to drop off a couple things before we take you to yours" I said, to which Cato just nodded. I unlocked the door slowly and dropped my bags in the foyer and turned around to quickly leave.

"Can we stay for a couple minutes? To warm up?" Cato asked, more like demanded seeing as how he just pushed past me into the house. I think he just wanted an excuse to go inside my house, but I didn't bother arguing. He walked down the hallway and turned back around to see me standing there, just waiting.

"Ready to go?" I motioned towards the door, but he ignored me. Instead, he just stepped closer, but I retreated a bit, only to be stopped by a wall behind me.

I had a right to be backing away though. I had seen Cato kill people, and his proximity to me made me slightly uncomfortable. Then again, he would have a right to be afraid of me too, I had killed several people as well. He continued to step closer and I could tell he was about to kiss me. I peered over his shoulder and saw Ashton's figure in the shadows, but before I could warn Cato, Cato leaned in and kissed me anyway.

The feeling was a bit ancient, his lips pressed lightly against mine. His hands trailed up my arms and cupped the back of my neck, but I just kind of stood there, dumbstruck. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed being kissed by Cato, but I was a little caught off guard. Suddenly, Cato was pushed away from me and Ashton stood in front of me. "Slut" he said through his teeth, and slapped me across the face as hard as he could.

**oooooh whats cato gon doooooooooooooooooo?!**


	7. Enough To Make A Girl Dizzy

**Sorry i havent written in a while. my grandma died recently and its been really stressful but ive been doing a lot of writing lately to get my mind off of it, and i must say, its been really helpful**

****Chapter 7

Enough To Make A Girl Dizzy

I collapsed on the floor, clutching the side of my face. I could already taste the metallic taste of the blood inside my mouth, but i just spit it back out, and rose to my feet, anger seething through my body. I had totally forgotten Cato was there until Cato side slammed Ashton, knocking him to the ground with a loud, hollow bang. I was sure Ashton had hit his head and was unconscious, but Ashton was still fighting back, full force. Ashton punched Cato a couple times in the face.

If Ashton had crossed Cato before the games had begun, Cato would have kicked his ass, no doubt. But now Cato was skinnier, less muscular, and lacking his sword. He was in a weak spot. As the two of them rolled around on the floor violently, I dashed to the kitchen and grabbed the biggest knife I could find. When I returned, they were both covered in blood and Cato's eye was beginning to swell up. It was only a matter of time before Ashton killed him.

But Ashton made a huge mistake by grabbing at Cato's shirt to try and get a better grip to punch him again. One of the first rules we had learned at the training center was to not use clothes to help you fight. People can easily escape that way. Cato wriggled out of the shirt as fast as he could and clumsily got to his feet and stood over Ashton, placing his foot on AShton's neck.

"Clove!" He ordered. My adrenaline was pumping so hard, I couldn't even process what was going on. Cato had pushed Ashton's head back with his foot, exposing more of his neck. Before I could even stop myself, I knelt down and drew the blade across his neck with a quick _swish_. We sat there in silence for a couple minutes. I still knelt on the floor, blood seeping from Ashton's body and creating a pool around my knees. Cato sat on a bar stool, catching his breath.

Finally he said something. "Who is- was- that?" He wiped some blood from his mouth.

"Cato I just killed someone" I held up my hands shakily, staring at them with a disgusted expression.

"Like seriously, what was some weird dude doing just hanging around your house. That's weird"

"Cato" I said levelly, but with the slightest warning tone.

"And where'd Sam go?" he looked at the door and shrugged. "Must've gone home when we left the train station."

"CATO!" I shouted angrily.

"What?" he finally looked at me.

"We aren't in the arena. We just killed someone."

"Out of pure self defense. They can't do anything if we did it out of self defense, right?"

"I don't care Cato. I just dont want his body as a space rug. I want him out, now" Cato frowned, picked up the body and left. He didn't come back for another hour and by the time he got back, I was done mopping the floor.

"Done"

"Where'd you put him?"

"It's a secret" he gave me a childish smile.

"Why is it a secret"

"In case I need to hide another body" he winked.

"Cato, do you have any idea what the Captiol will say if they find out. We could be sentenced to death. He proceeded to the living room nd laced his fingers behind his head.

"I doubt it"

"easy for you to say" I mumbled to myself.

* * *

It had been a week since the incident, and thankfully no one had found out. I wasn't sure where exactly Cato had hid the body but it didn't matter because as of now, my slate was clean. Well as clean as possible. I had finally told Sam and she was kind of happy, which I guess was a good thing.

I was sitting in the living room of my house, cracking my knuckles when I heard the door open. "Hello" Cato called, poking his head in.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, standing up to meet him at the door.

"I came to remind you that the victors tour is in two days" he watched me carefully, obviously sensing my shock. "You forgot, huh?"

"No" I lied.

"Figures, but hey. At least you've got another handsome victor like me to back you up" he smiled.

"Sure, whatever"

"'Oh come on, you're not going to stay mad at me forever, are you?" He pouted slightly, but I did my best to ignore him. "What's for dinner?" he asked, sitting at the bar stool.

"Who said I invited you to dinner?"

"Sam invited me" he said. I rolled my eyes. Of course _Sam_ invited him.

"Salad" I replied flatly.

"Just salad?"

"yep"

"What about pasta or something."

"I have had my share of pasta" I filled a bowl with lettuce and handed Cato the plate. "eat your salad" I commanded. He gave a little half smile and a wink before putting a piece of lettuce in his mouth and pretending to choke. "Ha ha very funny. You're terrible at fake choking" but he didn't stop choking. Finally, he slipped off the bar stool and onto the group. _Oh shiit. _

I sprinted to his side, kneeling next to him. I remembered CPR fromo my training center class and leaned down to give him a rescue breath. Instead of blowing air into his lungs I found he was kissing me and I pullled away abruplty.

"Oldest trick int he book"

"You're a pig" I rolled my eyes nd excused myself to the restroom. When I reached there, I slid down the wall, my head spinning. I hadn't imagined that kissing Cato would be so distracting. So exact to the way it felt before he tried to kill me. I didn;t know much, but I did know that even though my attitude towards him had changed, my lips still felt the same everytime the touched his, and it was enough to make me dizzy.


	8. In The Still of The Lights

**ERMAGERD thank you to all my LOVELY SUPER AWESOMETASTIC WONDERFUL fans who sent me a message with their support for my grandma. You have no idea how nice that is :)**

****Chapter 8

In The Still of The Lights

"Wake up!" Sam bounced on the edge of my bed.

"Five more minutes." I pleaded, pulling a pillow over my face.

"No, you have to get up nooowww!" She tore the blankets off my body and I shivered.

"Damn you" I growled as she stared back at me with a big grin.

"Chop Chop! Time to get downstairs! We have breakfast!" she called as she left the room. I sighed to myself. Today was the victors tour. No matter how long I had tried to avoid Cato, I would always have to be with him again for something with the Capitol. I guess that's how it was always going to be, but part of myself disagreed. I didn't have to pretend like I liked Cato for the Capitol, I think that I did t because part of me wished we were back together. But I didn't believe myself when I thought it. And even if I did, I wasn't going to tell Cato. He was cocky enough.

I ambled down the stairs in my sports bra and shorts, all too cold to be wearing in a cold house like this. I had draped a blanket around my shoulders, but when I saw Cato sitting at the bar stool, even the blanket wasn't enough to stop me from feeling exposed. I pulled it tighter around my body.

"Hello" he smirked.

"Yeah, uh, hi" It was the first time I had seen him since he kissed me (two days ago). Sam just stood at the counter, eyeing both of us.

"I didn't know you could avoid a boy for so long" he looked away and focused back on his food, chuckling to himself. I just ignored him and picked up an apple.

"Ready to go?" I asked Sam.

"Might wanna put on some clothes sweetie" Cato smiled, shaking his head. I bared my teeth. _Don't call me sweety._ I thought.

"Your prep teams will be here in anytime" Sam announced, glancing at the clock.

"Wait, both prep teams are coming _here?" _I demanded.

"They wanted to see you leave the house together. For publicity" Sam wouldn't look me in the eye.

Luckily, the prep teams came through the door, sparing me from hurting Sam. Some of them carried large boxes of what I guessed was makeup and others carried several hangers occupied by clothes. Cato clapped his hands together. "Let's go people" he led them off into the living room.

"Uh, yeah, follow me" I said, still a bit dazed as they followed me up the stairs and into my bedroom. I sat on the bed and let them go to work. When they were finished, I was wearing a long sleeved black dress and patterned black tights. It definatley wasn't going to be enough to keep me warm outside. I had a white flower fastened into my hair and natural makeup. Flo, my stylist, stepped back as I twirled.

"Perfect" she smiled, putting her hands on my shoulders. "You look perfect." she handed me a pair of white heeled booties.

"Thanks" I smiled. It was nice for someone to call me perfect. Last time I heard that was when Cato- oh nevermind.

I walked slowly down the stairs and when I finally reached the bottom, I noticed Cato was staring. When he saw me looking, he averted his eyes and rubbed the back of his neck, pretending he had never been staring in the first place. I proped myself against the banister as I pulled the shoes on that were going to give me the biggest blister I would ever have. The I noticed Brutus and Enobaria barging through the door.

"You are five minutes late!" Enobaria growled, mostly at me.

"Not my fault" I walked past her. I could tell her face was turning red.

"Where is your stylist!? I need a word" she demanded. I turned around to look at her when I reached the door.

"I thought you were the one who said we were late" I raised an eyebrow. She looked at me, her jaw dropped, and then the corners of her mouth turned up.

"Fine, lets go" she tried to hide the fact that she was smiling.

"Alright, Capitol photographers are outside already so, uh" Brutus pulled Cato towards me awkwardly, lacing our fingers together. "Try and get along"

I opened the door and was smacked int he face first by then cold, secondly by the abrupt flashes of lights from the cameras.

"Clove, Cato over here!"

"Over here"

"Smile for the camera!" they all said. To avoid from freezing to death, I had to snuggled up closer to Cato, which I partially didn't mind. And he didn't seem to either, seeing as he put his arm around my shoulder. We walked through the crowds and we were at the train platform when someone said.

"Can we get a kiss for the camera!?" I looked up at Cato and he just winked at me. He placed a finger under my chin and lifted my face to his. His lips were warm pressed against mine and he licked my lower lip before sliding his tongue into my mouth. _It's just for show. _I told myself, but no matter how many times I told myself it would never be just for show. I still loved him.

He picked me up and twirled me in a circle and when my feet finally touched the ground again, he broke away. I could see his blue eyes soften, the way the did before the games when he saw me, and I could feel a pang in my heart. I reached up on my tip toes so I could reach his ear.

"I still love you" I whispered. It was out of sure impulse. I didn't mean for me to say it in front of all the cameras, it's not like they heard me though. His eyes sparkled and I could see happy tears pricking at his eyes. He couldn't cry in front of the camera! So I just kissed him again.

**REVIEWS WOULD BE** O-MAZING


	9. Continuous

**OMG OMG OMG I LOOOOOOVE YOU FOLLOWERS/REVIEWERS WHO EXTENDED THEIR SUPPORT. I WILL TRY AND WRITE ANN AMAZING CHAPTER FOR YOU GUYZZZ**

Chapter 9

Continuous

We shuffled onto the train and sat down on the couch. Cato still hadn't said a word. He just kept hold of my hand while I lie across the couch, my head in his lap while he played with my hair. Brutus and Enobaria walked in.

"The cameras are gone, you cans top now." Brutus offered, but I didn't pull away. I just nestled my head and closed my eyes.

"Ah. Let's give 'em some time Brutus" Enobaria, with that knowing twinkle in her ye, left the room with Brutus close at her heels. I noticed Herb Monasterio, our escort, tiptoeing after them, hoping we wouldn't see her. I guess all the tributes she'd ever been with scared her. But when Cato and I were finally alone, I decided to break the silence. I sat up and looked at him closely, and he just gave me a quizzical glance.

"Say something!" I demanded, a little frustrated.

"Clove, what do you want me to say? I'm ecstatic on the inside, a little shocked on the outside, but overall I'm just grateful. Good enough for you?" he said.

"Sorry" I lie back down. "I''m just paranoid."

"I know" he leaned down to kiss my forehead, a tingling sensation that I hadn't felt in forever.

"Do you think we can ever be the same?" I asked.

"I'm sure we'll find a way. And even if we don't, I'm sure the new us will be better than the first."

"Yeah" he always knew what to say. Always. I peered at thee clock. "So we'll be in District one in about an hour. What do we do until then?" I questioned.

"Well" he raised his eyes suggestively. "I know something" he winked and I just bit my lip, trying to hide the fact that I was smiling. I just gave a quick nodd. He swept me into his arm, carrying me off to the bed room. It still looked the same way it always did, littered with Capitol merchandise and ugly colors. He pushed me up against the wall and I wrapped my legs around his waist, messing his hair up a bit, giggling. "You messed up my do" he frowned. "I guess I'll have to get even." he latched onto my neck, giving me a huge hickey and making me have a big fit of laughing.

"Stop- haha- Cato!- Stop- Hahaha!" he finally pulled of and met my lips, silencing my laughter. It was a deep passionate kiss. A wanting kiss. A longing kiss. A needing kiss. A kiss I had never had before. A kiss that made my stomach flip and my head pound. A kiss that just makes your heart go wild.

He carried me over to the bed, dropping me and then climbing on top, kissing my lips, my neck, my jaw bone. I finally tugged at the bottom of his shirt and he smiled against my lips as I helped him pull it off. I did my best to wriggle out of my dress without losing Cato's lips for too long. He loosened his belt and dropped it on the floor and pulled off his pants.

"Clove" he mumbled. I put my leg behind his back, bringing him closer to me. "Clove" he demanded.

"What?" I pulled away, concerned. "What's wrong?"

"I just- I don't think now's a good time. We were apart for a couple months. I don't think we can really start where we left off. I think we could use time" no matter how much I agreed and how glad I was he had said it, I as still a little disappointed. I nodded and he gave me another kiss and pulled me towards him.

"So... are we jusst gonna sleep the whole ride?" I questioned.

"I was planning on it" he smiled.

"Well I'm gonna go get something to eat" I started to pull away from him but he pulled me back closer to him than before.

"No you're not" he whispered in my ear, kissing my cheek before closing his eyes and drifting into sleep. It was weird going back to sleep so early in the morning, but I obliged my brain. But when I closed my eyes, I really wish I hadn't.

* * *

I was scrambling up the Cornucopia, I was getting struck by lightning and falling out of a tree, I was getting hit in the head with a rock, I was being posioned by tracker jackers. You name all the ways I almost died in the games, and I relived those moments in my dreams. I remembered the pain, but in my dreams the pain was magnified. Intensified. I'm pretty sure I died twelve times in that one hour sleep. I finally woke up after the mutations had successfully ripped apart my corpse limb by limb and screamed.

"Shhh" Cato whispered. I started to cry. "It's okay, it's just a dream."

"i died. I died so many times." I sobbed.

"You're alive Clove, I promise."

"I was so scared" my whole body shuddered with sobbs as I cuddled closer to Cato's body. I suppose it was the first time I had ever admitted I was scared, because Cato looked so shocked.

"I know Clove. You're safe now" I kissed my forehead, wiping away the tears. When the bedroom door opened, I shoved my face into a pillow. I heard Enobaria's voice, with the slightest sound of pride in it.

"Well, sorry to walk in, um. Both of your outfits for the gala tonight are hanging in the bathrooms. We'll come back for them after the ceremony. Be ready in three minutes" she walked out, shutting the door.

"C'mon Clove, let's get up." Cato offered. I slid to the end of the bed, pulling my dress back on and doing the best to cover my puffy eyes

* * *

The ceremony we terrible. I saw Marvel's parents, a man and a woman both with the same elfish features, the man built with muscle, and the mother seemed graceful. And they both had green eyes. They just quietly cried, giving us a couple appreciative nods, knowing we hadn't been the ones to kill their son.

Then there was GLimmer's family. Her mother was tall and blonde with blue eyes. She had made up her face with red lipstick and a glittery eyes shadow, with her hair in an up swept bun. Her father was a big burly man. He looked like he could almost be from two the way his muscles bulged with that angry look always in his eyes. And then I saw her husband and daughter off in the crowd.. Her daughter was probably two by now, really small. A little girl that would never know her mother. So when the ceremony ended, I walked up the Glimmer's husband and child.

"Hi, I'm Clove" I shook his hand. "You mus be Glimmer's husband"

"As a matter of fact I am."

"Nice to meet you..."

"Sheen"

"Nice to meet you Sheen. And this is?" I asked, tickling the feet of the little girl, causing her to let out a delighted squeal.

"Price"

"Hi Price" I said in a baby voice.

"Clove, thank you so much for putting Glimmer out of her misery when the tracer jackers got her. It means so much" Sheen looked on the verge of tears.

"'I couldn't bear to see a friend suffer"

"Thank you" he said again.

"No problem Sheen. And if you ever need anything for little Paige, you call me. Or Enobaria. Someone who knows where to find me" I smiled, handing him a list of all the possible ways to reach me.

"Okay." he gave a pitiful smile and I hugged him. He started to cry and I felt my heart drop. GLimmer was really gone for him. When he saw he victors in real life, he would know that Glimmer was gone.

The victors tour went on like that for a couple of days. The galas were just lavish parties with ridiculous amounts of food. And for Cato and me, we weren't spending as much time together as we used to, which I guess could be a good thing. I did fee smothered sometimes. We would talk to different people at the ceremonies and at the galas, and we only really saw each other at breakfast. We didn't really sleep in the same bed either. He had advertised us taking it slow, and I had agreed, so I guess I'd have to livve with it. Sure, he would come give me a good night kiss, but I just missed his arms around me while I slept. While the mutations tore me apart time after time. While I died continuously.

The victors tour was very bland like that until we reached District four.


	10. Mistake

**Lol so every time I start to write a new chapter, I reread the chapter I wrote last week and I noticed that I said Paige instead of Price. Sorry, I'm writing a sory and theres a character named Paige. My bbaaaddddddddd.**

****Chapter 10

Mistake

"How do I look" I asked as I walked into Cato's room. He was laying on his bed, staring the ceiling with a blank expression. When I walked in, he sat upso he could see me.

I twirled in my dark blue dress. "You look," he searched for the word before standing up and kissing me on the cheek. "You look stunning."

"Wow" I turned to the mirror to put my pearl earrings in. "Since when did you use such an elaborate vocabulary?"

"A lot can change in a little time" she shrugged, coming up behind me and wrapping his arms around my shoulders.

"I guess it can" I smiled as I turned around. I was almost as tall as him in my high heels.

"You look great" he brushed a piece of hair out of my face and kissed me lightly.

"I would say the same," I stepped back from him. ", but you're not even dressed" I motioned to his khakis and button up shirt he had work to the ceremony.

"Yeah, I know" he laughed, turning around so he could change. He pulled on his black dress pants and switched into a white button up shirt with a black jacket while I laid onto his bed.

"We've got ten minutes" I reminded him as I stared at the ceiling, trying to find what he was staring at before. There was nothing; just a chandelier and a white ceiling.

"That's all the time I need" he hovered over me suddenly, smirking.

"Yeah, sure, whatever" I pushed him away and sat back up. "These constant galas are really getting boring" I frowned.

"We've only got ten more to go" he sighed, taking my hands and helping me to stand.

"yeah, only"

"It'lll be fun, don't worry" he kissed me again.

"We should probably get going" I pulled his hand and he followed me down the hallway and into the living room. Enobaria and Brutus and everyone else were already ready to go.

* * *

"Where's Cato?" I asked Enobaria after I finished talking to a peacekeeper.

"I haven't seen him" she shrugged, returning to dancing with Brutus.

"Thanks for the help" I said sarcastically, walking off to get a drink. Before I could reach the table, someone came up behind me and tapped me on the shoulder.

"M'lady" Jackson, the boy from the bonfire bowed awkwardly.

"Jackson? What the hell are you doing here?"

"Just thought I'd stop by" he backed me up to the punch table so I couldn't move. "Just thought I'd see how you were doing." His eyes wandered downward.

"You're drunk, Jackson. You shouldn't be here."

"C'mon Clove, lets go outside and have a little fun." he pulled my arm roughly.

"No Jackson" I tired to sound grounded, but my voice shook slightly.

"Stop being so difficult" he slurred, pulling me harder. I'm not sure why I didn't scream, I just let Jackson pull me outside. When we reached outside I noticed a truck pulled into the parking lot with the tailgate down. Four boys sat on the tailgate, al blowing smoke into the night and drinking. Out of all of them only one caught my eye; Cato.

"Cato, what are you doing, get back inside" I walked up to him after Jackson had let me go.

"I'm just havin' a little fun, c'mon don't be such a party pooper" he smiled as the boys around him laughed.

"Cato, you need to be inside."

"I'll go inside when I feel like it."

"Have you done any drugs tonight?" I asked.

"Nope" he made a popping sound with his lips.

"Okay" I nodded. "Let's go inside" I tired to pull him off the tailgate but he just fell back, passed out. "Really? Wow. It had to be tonight you chose to get wasted." I muttered angrily, but the boys that were sitting next to Cato looked at me hungrily.

"You know, since Cato's out, we could have our own little party outside" one of them hopped off the tailgate and ran a finger over my jaw line.

"Leave me alone" I glared at him. "Cato, wake up" Cato didn't move.

"C'mon over here" two of the boys yanked me farther from the truck towards an alley.

"Cato! Right now would be a really great time to wake up!" I screamed. When we reached the alley the three started tugging at my clothes and I bared my teeth, waiting for the right moment.

When one of them tried to kiss me, I lifted my leg and yanked the knife I had stowed under the folds of my dress. I flicked it at one of the and he fell to the ground. The next one looked at me with fear.

I didn't remember much, but I just remembered soiling my dress in the boys blood.. I remember thinking _how can I go back tot he party like this? _

"Clove, what have you done?"


	11. Selfless Sacrifice

**So life is just progressively getting worse. FML. **

****Chapter 11

Selfless Sacrifice

"Clove, what have you done?" I heard a shaky voice from behind me. As I turned around, I expected the worse. A peacekeeper, Enobaria or Brutus, because with my luck I wouldn't get out of this one. Annie was standing in a casual floral dress, her arms wrapped around herself.

"Annie? What are you doing here?" I wiped my hands on my dress, seeing has how it was already soiled.

"I- uh" she rubbed her forehead but wouldn't meet my eyes. "I was at a bar with Finnick and we saw Cato."

"Where's Finnick?"

"He's still checking on Cato."

"Right." I stood there silently before bending down to pick up my knife.

"Clove. How could you- why would you- what gave you the right to kill them?" she had tears welling in her eyes. She just didn't understand. not at all.

"Annie, did you not see them. They had their hands all over me." I did my best to keep a level voice.

"Yeah, but you could have told them to stop."

"I don't think asking them nicely would have worked." I replied.

"Do you know what they do to people who kill other people, Clove? You could be in serious trouble, and I can't just let it go unreported." I could hear guilt in her voice as she opened her mouth.

"Annie, please, don't scream." I clamped a hand over her mouth. "Please Annie, you never saw this. Promise me you never saw this. I got mud on my dress and Cato walked me back to the train and we didn't go back to the party. Right?" Annie nodded her head as a couple tears fell.

"I'm sorry." she muttered and then let out a blood curdling scream. Cato appeared at the end of the alley.

"Clove are you ok- oh shit." he walked to me, pushing past Annie who was crying even harder now. "What happened?" he asked, cupping my face in his hands.

"Nothing"

"Are you hurt."

"no, I'm fine. C'mon Cato, we've got to go. We can't stay here." I pulled his arm.

"Where do you expect us to go Clove?"

"What?" I stopped dead in my tracks and turned to him. Normally he would be booking it out of the alley, running to stow us away until it was safe.

"It just feels like cheating."

"cheating? What the hell? How are we cheating?"

"We're cheating fate. Cheating death, even"

"Since when did you become a sentimentalist?" I asked accusingly.

"Clove, I'm tired."

"Are you drugged? What the hell is wrong with you Cato?" But I didn't have time to wait for his answer. I heard the Peacekeepers running towards the alley. "Whatever, you stay Cato. I can't cause this Nation anymore trouble than I already have." I noticed a ladder on the side of one of the building and climbed up.

* * *

"Clove?" I heard the voices calling through the night, but I did my best to hide. I knew they'd find me, question me, and figure out I had killed those boys. I sunk deeper into the shadows against the trunk of a palm tree. ""Clove!" the voice was more frantic. I tried to hide myself behind the tree more, but ended up just stubbing my toe and letting out a loud grunt.

"Shit" I mumbled.

"Clove, is that you?"

"Who is that?"

"It's a peacekeeper. Brutus and Enobaria are requesting you back at the train." so that's it. They were going to lure me in and try to get me to confess.

"Alright." It was dark enough by then that the blood on my dress looked more like mud.

"YOu alright Miss?" the peacekeeper asked.

"Fine" I mumbled as I walked back to the train.

When the cart door closed everyone was sitting in the living room with grim expressions. Well, not everyone.

"Clove, what the hell was going through your head when you ran off and- what the hell is on your dress? Is that blood?" Enobaria barked.

"Yeah." I shrugged.

"What?"

"I killed three boys in the alley."

"Wait. You killed them? Clove, that's impossible." Brutus stood up, suddenly taking a great interest.

"How? I have the blood on my hands to prove it. I even have the knife." I pulled out the knife and showed them. Herb gagged.

"Because, Cato told the peacekeepers that he killed them. He's being held in the Justice building until morning, and then he's being transported to the Capitol."


	12. Shattered

Chapter 12

Shattered

"Brutus if you are kidding I swear I wills kin you in the middle of the night and-"

"He's not kidding, Clove." Enobaria said sternly. She paced and rubbed her forehead, mumbling to herself. "Out of all of my tributes, the ones that are the victors have to be complete and total dumbasses. What did I do for this punishment?"

"Where is he?" I insisted.

"He's at the Justice building. You can't see him until morning." Brutus repeated. I ignored him and stomped to my room. I changed into a pain of jeans and combat boots and a jacket and barged back through everyone, back to the door.

"Where are you going?" Enobaria asked.

"TO go see Cato." I jumped down from the cart and onto the tracks, shoving my hands into my pockets.

"I told you Clove, you can't go now." Brutus jumped down behind me and followed me.

"I don't care." I mumbled.

"Clove." Brutus placed a firm hand on my arm.

"Brutus I swear if you don't let go of me, you will regret it." I said sternly, staring in his eyes angrily. He released my arm and I stomped off again.

I followed the street lamps, hoping to find the Justice building. When I did, I noticed all the lights off in he building except for a room up top. When I tried to open the heavy doors, they were locked, but I picked the lock with my knife. The door creaked slightly as I opened it, spilling a golden thread of light across the marble floor. I walked up the stairs until I found the room with the light on. I peered in and this is what I saw.

Cato was slouched on the floor, his wrists tied to a pole. A lone tall, dark haired peacekeeper whipped him in the back, but by the looks of it, Cato was already unconcious. It took all of my being to not barge in and take the whip and start hitting the peacekeeper.

"Excuse me." I said in my silkiest voice, opening the door.

"Clove? We instructed the mentors to keep you at the train." he replied.

"Yes, I know. I just got, you know, lonely." I walked closer to him and his breath hitched. I smiled menacingly at the fact that I could have that affect on anyone.

"Right, um. Well I'm going to have to ask you to leave." his voice shook.

"Really?" I frowned pitifully as I backed him up against the wall. He nodded but with each nod his face inched closer to mine. When I finally caught him completely off gaurd, I jammed my elbow into his jugular, causing him to crumple onto the floor, unconcious. After I made sure he was out cold, I sprinted to Cato's side.

"Cato? Cato, wake up. You're are the dumbest asshole the world has ever know, you know that? You're screwed over. _We_ are screwed over. Why did you tell them?" I rushed. When I realized he wasn't concious, I picked up a bucket of water ad dumped it on him. His eyes shot open and then he winced, iting his lip trying not to scream. The water must've burned against his new scars.

"Clove. What are you doing here?" He asked.

"Do you really expect me to sit on the train while you whither away?" he smiled.

"Listen, someone is coming to help us. He's going to get us out of this situation." his breathing was heavy and his eyes droopy. "I'm sorry."

"For what Cato? For being dumbass? Oh, you don't have to apologize for that. That's always going to happen." he grinned, wincing a bit.

"C'mon Clove." I turned around and Finnick stood in the doorway. "I talked to the peacekeepers and you're staying in one of the justice building rooms so you can see Cato." he took my hand and helped me get up.

"I love you Clove." Cato peered up at me.

"Love you too." I gave a half hearted smile, even though I could feel myself breaking into pieces, slowly and painfully.

* * *

"Clove, wake up" I jumped up abruptly. Enobaria took my arm and led me down the hallway and into a dining room. At the table was a man I had seen before. His shaggy blonde hair hung around his face and his blue eyes glowed brightly. He was the drunk mentor. Haymitch.

"Haymitch, what are you doing here?" I asked.

"Look, sweetheart. I want to help your boyfriend, but you;'ve got to get up at a decent hour." he glanced at his watch. "Seven o'clock and I haven't even had a drink yet."

"How can you help us?" I sat down, suddenly very intrigued.

"Look, sweetheart, we can tell the Capitol it was all a misunderstanding. Cato admitted it because he was tired and mentally impaired. I know exactly what we'll tell them, don't worry." he crunched on a piece of bacon. "But until we get to the Capitol, you need some sleep." he slouched. "You look horrible."

"Thanks." I brushed a piece of hair from my face.

* * *

"SO CAto, you know what you're going to say, right?" Haymitch double checked with Cato. Cato nodded. "And Clove, you just keep your mouth shut. And when he says it, you need to start crying."

"Says what?" I demanded. Haymitch ignored me. Our prep teams fixed our makeup and then Cato and I took the stage. The Capitol crowd roared as we sat on a love seat, although Cato,s hands were cuffed in front of him. Cato wore an icy blue suit and I wore a flowy white dress. I was so consumed and horrified by the fact that I was in the Capitol again that I didn't even notice we had started the interview.

"do you think he did it, Clove?" Ceaser asked.

"What? NO of course not!" I laughed it off and he just nodded.

"And Cato, if you didn;t do it, why did you confess?" Caesar asked.

"Well," his chains rattled as he repositioned himself. "I was extremey tired, I mean, with what Clove and I have been going through." he glanced at me lovingly and my heart warmed.

"And what is it you've been going through."

"We lost a baby"


	13. Safe

Chapter 13

Safe

There was a collective gasp from the audience and everyone looked at me carefully.. I tried to remember what Haymitch had told me to do and began crying. It wasn't actually that hard to cry at that moment, because I was so overwhelmed what with Cato being in jail and all. Cato placed his large hand on my knee and gave me a pitiful smile.

"I'm so sorry for your loss." Caesar added, gasping along with the rest of the Capitol.

"Thank you." Cato replied. A peacekeeper walked forward and freed Cato's hands from the shackles. We both stood up and hugged each other in a long embrace and I didn't want to let go. It seemed as though if I let go, the Capitol would take him away again.

"Well thank you for the lovely interview, and we look forward to hearing from you in the future." Caesar nodded towards us and smiled and i burried my face in Cato's suit to hide my relieved smile. He was free. We were free.

For the time being at least.

We exited the stage and Haymitch welcomed us with a drunken, "good acting sweetheart, really sold that one." and a nodd. Brutus and Enobaria were no where to be found, probably back upstairs in the room

"Shall we?" Cato offered his arm and I took it with a relieving laugh.

"We shall." I mimicked. We went up the elevator and onto the district two floor. It seemed like so long ago that we had been here, and all the memories came flooding back to my mind.

I walked to the window that over looked the city and saw the lights illuminating the dark night sky. I felt Cato walk behind me and he pushed the hair away from my neck, leaving it bare. "I'm sorry, Clove." he sighed, breathing onto my skin.

"Guess you'll just have to make it up to me." I smirked, turning around to kiss him.

* * *

Cato and I lay there, in the bed we had shared last year. His breath was still staggering and my heart was beating soo fast. I cuddled closer to his chest as he rested his lips on my head, petting my hair softly.

"So about what you said." I traced shapes on his chest. "At the interview. Do you think we'll ever have kids?"

"C'mon Clove, don't be ridiculous. We talked about this last year. I'd be a terrible father and plus we're not the type to have kids anyway. I'm fine with just you and me."

"I know but-" he silenced me with a gingerly kiss and my train of thought dissapeared.

"Clove." his mouth tightened. "I know we have our fights, and our dissagreements, but I've always known you were my one and only. You knnow that right?" I nodded. "I just want you to know that I love you more than you can even imagine."

"Riddle me this, oh wise Cato. If I mean so much to you, why have we not gotten married yet?" I asked, peering up a him. His lips pulled back into a wide grin.

"I tried that last year." he laughed.

"Well who's to say we can't get it right this year?"

"You're right. Clove, will you marry me?" he raised an eyebrow. "And don't say no because that's not an option." I laughed.

"Yes Cato."

* * *

"Hey Clove?" Cato shouted through the house.

"I'll be down in a second." I replied, struggling with the button on my skinny jeans. he walked right in anyway.

"No need to dress up for me." he kissed me on the cheek. "I'd love you just the same in yoga pants."

"Yeah," I kept struggling with the button, determined to spite the goddamn pants. "I know."

"Plus, we're not going anywher. We're just going to watch tv."

"Yeah, I know." I sighed, slipping off the jeans and puling on sweats.

"That's better." he smiled, picking me up over his shoulder and carrying me down the stairs. He dropped me on the couch and quickly followed, placing me in his lap. We sat there for a moment as he fiddled with the ring he had given me. It was nothing expensive, but it was still beautiful. A cluster of red and green sea glass on a silver band.

"Have you told your dad yet?" I asked.

"Nope"

"Have you even told Finnick?"

"Not really."

"Cato! Aren't you going to tell anyone. Are you embarrassed to call me your wife?" I asked sarcastically.

"What? No! I just want to drag out the surprise" he inched his face closer to mine.

"Wait wait wait." I insisted, un-mutifying the tv so we could her the announcement of the third quarter quell. I waited and waited until Snow finally anounced the deadly announcement.

"This years quarter quell tributes will be pullled from the existing pool of tributes." he said. My heart stopped.

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	14. Answers

Chapter 14

Answers

"Did he just-" I began. Cato nodded silently. His whole body was stiff. My heart was stopped. Cato took me off his lap and stood up to pace. "Surely they can't do that." I began to try and reason, muting the tv again.

"They can, they're the Capitol." he said sternly.

"Yeah, but, this has to be a joke or something."

"Clove, it's not a joke." he motioned to the tv where they were now showing all the pictures of the existing tributes. He motioned to it right as our pictures showed up.

"There's so many others though, Cato. They can't possibly pick one of us." I offered.

"It's possible."

"Well, what do we do?" I asked.

"I don't know." he sat back down and rubbed his thighs.

"We should probably start training again." I pointed out.

"Yeah." he mumbled, his mouth in a tight line.

"Do you think Felix is still there?" I was wondering about our old trainer. And then I wondered about Derrick, Cato's friend from the training center. I figured that after the games, I wouldn't have to see them again.

"I don't know."

* * *

I stood in front of the knife throwing target, stretching my shoulder. I moved my arms in circles and gripped the knife tight. Cato was already at the sword fighting station, taking all his rage out on the dummy. Whenever he was mad, he took it out during training, and then I started to wonder, how was he taking his anger out when we weren't in training?

"You two, huh?" Derrick asked, standing to watch me throw my knives.

"Why are you even here? You won't get picked for the reaping this year anyway."

"Doesn't mean I can't size up all the competition."

"Or maybe you're just trying to figure out who you're going to bet on." I replied snarkily.

"Maybe." he shrugged, smiling. "let's see that arm, Clove. Haven't gotten weak over these past few months, have you?"

"No weaker than you are." I replied. He thought about it for a second before giving me an angry look. I smirked and turned to the target.

I took a deep breath, extended the knife behind my head, and let it go. The blade flew through the air and hit the center of the target. I smiled.

"Beginner's luck." he mumbled.

"Oh, no. I'm not a beginner." I replied, placing my next knife blade under his chin while grimmacing at him. "Where's Felix anyway." i asked, throwing another knife.

"He quit." he shrugged.

"OMGEEE" Sam burst through the doors of the training center, breaking everyone's focus. I thought she was going to tackle me with a hug, but instead, she tackled Derick, kissing him. I was officially grossed out.

"Sam? Out of all the dumb asses in this district, you picked the dumbest ass?" I said.

"Course I did. Wouldn't expect anything less from me? Would you Clove." she smirked and kissed him again.

"Cato," I walked over to him as he swung his sword wildly and almost hit me. "Woah there hot shot, just coming to talk."

"Oh my gosh Clove, I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?"

"No," I laughed. "I'm fine. I was wondering if you want to practice some hand to hand with me."

"Can't you fight Sam or something?"

"Well the people in the arena won't be like Sam." he nodded in agreement and dropped his sword. We walked over to the mat. "Don''t go easy on me now." I said, smiling.

"I won't" he replied in a serious tone. He lunged at my and i kicked the inside of his knees. He fell to the floor and I climbed ontop.

"Gotcha." I whispered. He turned us over and pinned me down. We rolled back and forth for a while until he was on top again. And then, all the sudden I got this horrible feeling. The world was turning upsidedown and my stomach was pulling itself apart. It was like period cramps but a lot worse. "Ow, ow, ow" I said. Cato jumped off me, worriedly. Normally I would jump up and insist that I was fine, but I couldn't get up. I curled forward to see if it would relieve the pain, but it didn't.

"Whats wrong?" Cato asked.

"I- I don't know." suddenly, everything was fine. Cato looked at me suspiciously as if to ask me something. but I didn't have an answer for him.


	15. The Reaping: Part I

Chapter 15

The Reaping:Part I

I scooped the cereal out of my bowl, avoiding Cato's gaze. He watched me closely from across the table.

"Can I help you with something?' I finally asked, my spoon clattering into my cereal bowl.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"I'm fine!" I assured him for the fifth time since we got home.

"Positive?" he glanced at me.

"Yes, stop asking!" he ducked his head, abandoning the subject reluctantly. I stood up, picking up my bowl. I placed a hand on his. "You done? I asked. He nodded and I took the dishes to the sink, beginning to wash them.

"So just because we start training again, you decide to stop making actual dinners? Seriously, what is this cereal stuff?" he tipped his chair back on two legs.

"Hey," I pointed a spoon at him with a smile. "We aren't married yet. You can't boss me around just yet." Cato stood up, pacing to my side. He pulled me towards him and my face was dangerously close to his. His sweet breath hit my face like a cold wind in the morning, awakening my senses. All I wanted to do was reach up and kiss those lips. Take the smirk away and relax.

"yes," he smirked. "But I have ways to," his lips brushed my ear sending chills down my spine. ", of persuading you." I stood there for a moment but finally got up the strength to push him away, when actually, all I wanted to do was pull him closer.

"I have to do dishes, Cato." I started to wash them again and he laughed, taking the spoon and placing it in the sink, cutting off the water.

"You're stubborn." he cooed.

"You're persistent."

* * *

"Clove?" Cato asked from the other side of the door. I dry heaved into the toilet again. I hadn't eaten a thing in days, which probably wasn't a good idea, seeing as how my nerves were already on end at the fact that the reaping was today.

"Just one sec." I dry heaved again. I had been hiding the morning sickness episodes from Cato as best as possible. I sat for a moment until I decided it was safe to pull back from the toilet bowl. I considered that maybe this false morning sickness may very well be an annual thing, seeing as how it happened last year.

I pulled my sleek navy blue dress over my head, adjusting the bottom so it could cover my butt. It was tight to begin with, but the dress was almost suffocating. I couldn't even breath right. But I couldn't possibly be gaining weight, after all the training I had been doing. I left my hair natural and wavy, resting on my shoulders, with a couple sweeps of mascara on my lashes.

"Clove, come on, you're taking forever." Cato laughed. I pulled the door open.

"It takes a lot of effort to look this fabulous." I extended onto my tiptoes to kiss him, but he stopped me with his fingers.

"You'll ruin my lipstick." he teased, brushing past me into the bathroom. I scoffed as he just fixed his hair, studying it from every angle.

I walked downstairs to find Sam holding two grocery bags. "Breakfast?" I asked.

"Yes ma'am" she replied.

"Where's the beau?" I asked still disgusted at the fact that Sam and Derrick were a thing.

"Doesn't get up until twelve." she shrugged, placing the bags on the table. "Where's the hubby?"

"Fiance." I corrected. "Fixing his hair." I laughed.

"You nervous about today?" she asked nervously.

"Not really." I reached into the bag, pulling out a bagel and ripping off a piece with my teeth. I glanced in the bag again and then a bit closer "What's this?" I asked, pulling it out of the bag.

"Well I just thought between the morning sickness you've been telling me about and the episode at the training center we should be sure." I looked closely at the blue pregnancy test box.

"I'm telling you Sam, it's just an annual thing. Nothing to worry about." I put the box back on the counter.

"But. Between the morning sickness, the episode, and the weight gain, aren't you a little concerned?" she asked.

"No" I shrugged.

"Just take the test." she picked it up, handing it towards me.

"No"

"Morning sickness?" Cato stepped out of the shadowed doorway.

'Yeah, but it's nothing. It happened last year." I shrugged it off, continuing to eat my bagel.

"You're taking that test Clove" he said grimly.

"But Cato-"

"Now!" he insisted with such ferocity in his voice that I jumped. I took the test from Sam and walking into the bathroom.

* * *

I stared at the two pink lines closely. What could they mean? I tried to decipher the bigger meaning, turning it this way and that. I thought for a moment. Well, there were two pink lines with a white pathway in the middle. A clear, white pathway. So maybe it meant all clear.

"Well?" Cato insisted from the other side of the door.

"Sam," I opened the door and walked out. ", I think this one's broken."

"Broken?" she took it, studying it, then the box, then back again about four times. "It's not broken" she said in a way that made me seem absurd for thinking so. She looked from the box to the test again. "It's not broken." she insisted again, whispering again.

"Meaning?" Cato drawled.

"Meaning Clove," she looked directly at me. Looking me straight int he eye. I'll never forget the look she gave. "Clove, you're pregnant."

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**sorry I didn't post last weekend, i was in California. :DDDD**


	16. Even If It Kills Me

Chapter 16

Even If It Kills Me

"What?" I asked, sinking to the floor. Cato rushed forward and took the box, looking closely at it.

"She's right." he finally said after a long pause. "Clove, I-"

"No. This can't be real. I can't be pregnant! I had my period-" I thought for a moment. I couldn't even remember that last time. "Shit."

"We need to get you to a doctor and- and-" Cato started pacing, his blonde hair coming out of its slicked back style.

"And what? have them tell me the same thing we just found out?" I rested my elbows on my knees, hugging them closer to my chest.

"It's time." Sam was looking at her watch. "The reaping. You have to go now." she said. "I'm sorry Clove. I'll see you after." Sam scurried out of the house.

"Well, you heard the girl. We have to get to the reaping." Cato said. He reached down and pulled me up, holding me closely, but so gently. As if I would break.

But I was breaking. To bits and pieces on the inside. Careers weren't supposed to have children. Victors weren't supposed to worry about things like this when they had all the money in the world.

"Come on." he whispered softly, linking his hands into mine. We walked towards the door and I was utterly silent. We reached the reaping and I signed in. Cato and I stepped off to the side before separating. "Clove," his hands moved in mine. ", whatever happens. With this baby, I know we can handle it. We're mature. We can handle it." he reassured me.

"Yeah." I tried to shake out of my daze. "I- I know we can." I nodded. He kissed me and walked to his side, my hands feeling cold where they had detached from his. I went to my section blindly, not thinking about the people standing next to me. All I could think about was the baby.

Something living. Inside me. Something Cato and I had made. Something the Capitol would destroy. My child would have to go to reapings. To live this horrible lifestyle. I wasn't even sure about what kind of parents we would be. For so long it had been just Cato and me. We weren't even married yet! And now we were basically supposed to drop everything and have a child. Would we even keep the child? I could barely handle my own life drama, but having a kid? Having them ask me all these questions in life? Asking me for relationship advice?

Me. Tucking in a child at night. Me. Sending them off to the training center in the morning. I couldn't be the loving mother everyone expected a mom to be. I couldn't be caring. I was a cold hearted career. "Clove," a soft whisper was in my ear. I closed my eyes. "Clove, stop crying." there was a soft hand on my cheek. "Shhh, it's okay." Enobaria's voice rung in my mind. "You have to go now, okay?" she nodded at the stage.

"What?"

"Clove. They called your name."

"No, I didn't hear-"

"Clove? Ah there she is." said Herb, the escort. "Come on up." the sea of people parted and Enobaria shoved me in the direction of the stage.

"No, Enobaria. You can't make me do this." my face burned from the tears.

"I'm sorry Clove." her eyes were rimmed with tears as well.

"No, Enobaria, you don't understand." I reached towards her but she flinched away. "I'm pregnant. I can't go in the games."

"I'm sorry." she said again. My throat felt like sand paper as I was led towards the stage. I mounted the stage and Cato watched from the crowd. His eyes burned bright blue from the tears around them.

"Clove. No." I saw his lips move, but I couldn't hear the words. He rushed forward, restricted violently by the peacekeepers. "No!" he shouted. Blood pulsed in my ears and my head throbbed. He shoved the peacekeepers out of the way quickly and ran up on stage. He cupped my face and looked in my eyes frantically. He wrapped his arms around me and I heard the words I couldn't bear to hear.

"I voulenteer." his chest vibrated when he spoke. I grabbed a fistful of his shirt, gripping it tightly.

"No Cato." I said so only he could hear. "No, you can't"

"We will have this child Clove. Even if it kills me."

"That's the thing, Cato. It will." I bit my lip and it started to bleed.

"I won't let you go in alone. We're a family." an absent minded hand drifted down to my stomach. "And you're my wife. I won't let anything happen to you." a tear escaped his eye now and rolled down his cheek.


	17. Just Promise Me

Chapter 17

Just Promise Me

We were led to our separate visiting rooms and I sat on the floor, trying to hold back tears. Sam burst through the door, running past a peacekeeper. "Clove!" she shouted. "Clove, I'm so sorry!" she was crying now, but I didn't feel like comforting her. I was trying to comfort myself as it is.

"It's fine, Sam. You couldn't help it." I shrugged, trying to hide the fact that my voice was shaking.

"I know, I know but-"

"Sam, you should probably go home. It's late." I droned. She clamped her mouth shut, looking at me with wild eyes before standing up. She knew I didn't want to talk.

"I'm sorry. Clove" she said again as she stood int he door way.

"Me too." I replied. She shut the door behind her and I sprawled out on the ground, staring at the ceiling. I had found out so many things that day and my brain was on overload. Cato and I had had a hard enough time putting up with each other last games, but now? With a baby? I wasn't even sure I could survive the first couple minutes of the games. Who knew what a baby would do to my physical shape? How would I protect myself?

Of course, Cato would eventually throw himself into the battle to save me, but I didn't want him to. If one of us was going to die, it was going to be me. No matter what Cato said.

Then I thought about the baby. We didn't necessarily have to _keep _the baby_._ It's not like this is the life I would want for my child. A life with career parents who could barely manage to love each other? My child living in a world of violence? I couldn't do that. As a matter of fact, Cato and I had talked about being parents when I had my pregnancy scare last year. We had both agreed we would be horrible parents and when we found out I wasn't pregnant we were kind of glad.

But I also remembered the tinge of sadness when I found out. Like I had lost something. But It's not like I had lost something that was ever there. I wasn't _actually_ pregnant last year.

But this year, I was. And I wasn't sure how I would survive the games with a child. Of course they would put me in, even if I _was_ pregnant. It just made the show all the more interesting.

"Time to go" a peacekeeper's voice broke me out of my reverie.

"Coming." I replied, rolling over and pushing myself off the floor. The peacekeeper lead my way to the train and I walked in, watching as the door shut behind me. I recognized the waft of Capitol food throughout the cart and Cato was sitting in a big blue arm chair. When he saw me, his eyes flared a bright blue before he rushed forward and held me close. He buried his face into my hair and I could feel my own sobs choking in my throat.

"You okay?" he asked and I could hear the pain in his voice.

"No." I replied, gripping at his shirt. But no matter how close I got to Cato, it couldn't comfort me.

* * *

Brutus and Enobaria had avoided us ever since we boarded the train. They just milled around, pretending that they were busy. I knew Enobaria couldn't bring herself to talk to me. And for that I was a bit glad, because I don't know if I could have prevented myself from clawing out her eyes if she tried to talk to me. So Cato and I had both gone off into our bedroom and we were laying together, so close I could feel his heart beat. His cold finger tips thrummed against my back as he looked into my eyes, as if trying to memorize them. I cast my eyes downward.

"Clove." he breathed.

"I don't know what to say." I replied with an almost robotic tone. He shut his mouth with a pained expression.

"Well, for starters, do we even want to keep the baby?" Cato began. My hear sunk a bit at the fact he had brought up the question. There were so many reasons for us not to have a baby, but I kept thinking _how could I get rid of something the Cato and I made? How could I ever forgive myself?_

"Do you?" I asked, peering up at him.

"Yes." he replied instantaneously. "But what do you want?"

"I don't really know. By keeping the baby, that automatically means I'm gonna survive the games. That's only a meer possiblity. So it's better if we just get rid of the baby." the words stung in my mouth.

"But aren't you even curious? What it would be like to be a family?" he asked.

"Yes, of course I am, but Cato, we can't be a family. In a matter of weeks, one, or maybe even two, of us are going to be dead." I sighed. He stroked me hair with his fingers, completely emotionless.

"You would be a great mom."

"Oh yeah, and how would you know?" I smirked, attempting to lighten the mood.

"Because of how you were with Timmy." he replied. I tensed, remembering the little boy Cato had killed in last years games. We never talked about Timmy, but for some reason, Cato had brought it up.

"I guess." I shrugged.

"Clove, if in a couple days one of us is going to die, and chances are it'll be me-" Cato began. I was about to protest when he placed a finger over my lips. "-then I want to get married. For real this time, before the games start. Clove, I want to call you my wife, even if it is for a couple days. I want to die knowing that you are my wife and you'll raise our family."

"Cato," I blinked hard.

"Just," he looked so conflicted. ", promise me." I nodded my head.

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	18. Forgive or Forget

Chapter 18

Forgive or Forget

The train came to a halt and the world turned. "Cato," I mumbled, gripping his t-shirt.

"Mhmmm."

"Let go of me." I tried to pull his strong arms off of me.

"Why?" he pulled me on top of him and smiled.

"Because I'm about to puke in your face." I replied. He let go of me and I dashed into the bathroom.

"You okay?" Cato asked, following me into the bathroom. His hair was sticking up in different directions and his eyes sleepy.

"I'm fine." I sat back from the toilet and rubbed my eyes. "Can you get me some different clothes?" I asked. He nodded and walked back out of the bathroom. He returned with new clothes.

"Here." He picked me up and helped me get dressed.

"Shit." I breathed, trying to button the pants in haste.

"Maybe we should try a dress or something."

"No, i've got this." I replied. The button popped. "Fuck." I kicked the cabinet door angrily.

"Clove, stop."

"I cant even button my fucking pants!" I kicked the cabinet door again, pain shooting up my leg.

"Clove! Stop!" Cato pulled me into a hug.

"I'm sorry." I sobbed.

* * *

"Ready?" Cato asked, taking my hand.

"I guess." I still tried to adjust the peacekeeper dress I was wearing. It rose too high up my thigh and I was horribly uncomfortable. "I look like a slut." I flicked my braided hair back over my shoulder.

"No you don't." Cato lied.

"Yeah, I do."

"Yeah, you do. But you're _my_ slut." he pulled me closer and kissed me.

"I hate this dress with a burning passion." I said angrily, stepping up into the carriage as the fabric tightened on my legs.

"Don't worry." Cato stepped up next to me. "I'll rip it off for you later." he winked.

"You sure know how to sweet talk a girl." I retorted. The horses lurched forward and the gate doors opened.

District one's tributes were dressed in elaborate sparkling outfits. The girl, presumably Cashmere, wore a floor length dress, decorated like a diamond. Light reflected off of it in a rainbow of color. NExt to her was Gloss, wearing a white suit, embellished in sparkling designs. We followed behind, the crowd roaring loudly.

Roses were thrown towards up and Cato even caught one, handing it to me sweetly. The crowd went wild. We reached the end of the way and I watched all the other tributes. "Welcome back tributes." Snow's voice filled my head like a bad dream. He continued to talk but I ignored him, my mind wandering freely. As the ceremony ended, Cato stepped down from the carriage. He picked me up bridal style and carried me to the elevator, and I did my best to hide my giggling. We reached the elevator that was soon crowded. The doors started to close before the female victor from four, Johanna, stopped the door from closing.

"WEren't thinking about having a career party without me, were you?" Johanna asked.

"Speaking of careers," Gloss began, turning to Cato and I. "You two going to start a career group this year, or should we?" I looked at Cato.

"We haven't really thought about it that much, to be honest." I replied.

"Well, the invitation is open." Cashmere said plainly, but the invitation seemed oddly sincere.

"Thanks."

"You too." Gloss turned to the other tributes that had shown up. I hadn't noticed them before, but it was the pair from four. A short old woman with long gray locks. She was dressed in a long green dress, draped by a fish net. Next to her stood a familiar tall boy, standing with his shoulders square and his jaw set.

"Finnick?" Cato stared at his half brother.

"Cato." Finnick looked back and hey hugged each other.

"Do they know each other?" Johanna asked.

"'You could say that." I replied.

"I'm Johanna, by the way."

"Clove."

"Not so nice to meet you."

"What?"

"Oh nothing, I'm just being cynical again." Johanna smiled as if sharing an inside joke with herself.

"Anyway!" Cato intervened, wary of my rising temper. "Career group. Sounds good to me."

"Don't think you won't have a career group without me." Johanna piped.

"You're from district seven." Cashmere said.

"Your point is?"

"That we don't need people from upper districts coming into the group. Six is enough." Gloss backed up Cashmere.

"You think, just because I'm from seven that I don't know how to be a part of a career group."

"Oh, I'm not worried about that. I'm worried about you holding your own." Cashmere snapped.

"I think," Johanna moved swiftly in the cramped elevator, twisting Cashmere's arm behind her back and pushing her against the wall. ", that I can hold my own." she whispered in Cashmere's ear, who was obviously struggling.

"I think we should branch out. Maybe get some outlying district members. It would be good." FInnick spoke. Johanna let go of Cashmere who tried to recompose herself. "Look, I know no body wants to be here. The more people we can get to join the career group, the more will live. And if we can go on a non killing strike, the capitol will be forced to stop the games."

Gloss laughed. "You think it's that easy?"

"I know things that you don't know."

"Oh yeah, like what?"

"I-" Finnick looked nervous. "I can't say, but-"

"For god sake Finnick, just let it go. They're obviously not going to listen." The old lady, probably Mags, interrupted.

"Don't be doing us any favors." Cashmere gave a murderous glance as the doors open and her and Cashmere left.

"Well," Johanna sighed. "That was a bust."

"We tried, it's there loss."

"So can someone explain what exactaly is going on here?" I asked.

"We're boycotting the Hunger Games." Finnick replied.

"You can't just do that." I shook my head.

"I know but- we've got a couple things up our sleeves and-"

"LIke what?" Cato suddenly gained interest.

"Nothing." Johanna interrupted. "Nothing. Right Finnick?"

"Yeah." Finnick turned away.

"We're jjust trying to create the ideal career group. Not just the career tributes, but useful people." she explained. "And as of now, it seems to just be us." The elevator lurched a bit and I gripped the railings. "Nice rock!" Johanna's and shot forward, studying my ring closely. "Where'd you-" she looked up at Cato. "Oh."

"You're engaged?" Finnick asked.

"Yes."

"Anything else we should know?" Johanna asked.

"No." I quickly said. I didn't anyone treating me differently because I was pregnant.

"She's pregnant." Mags said. "I can see it in her face." The color rushed out of Johanna and Finnick's faces.

"You're knocked up?" JOhanna asked.

"You don't have to say it like that." I said.

"Well you can't keep the baby. You've got to have an abortion or something. It'll ruin your- our- chances of winning the games." Johanna tried to reason.

"No." Cato stepped in front of me instinctively.

"I will personally cut that child out for you if you like, but you can't go into these games pregnant. It's not safe. For anyone."

"I know." my voice came out small. "But-"

"Johanna, stop being so bitter." Mags snapped and Johanna jumped slightly. The elevator doors opened.

"Goodnight." Finnick mumbled.

"Night." I replied. Johanna looked disgusted as I shuffled behind Cato.


	19. Abort

**Sorry I haven't written in forever. Life has been really tough and I haven't had time, and we're moving. Thanks for waiting though.**

Chapter 19

Abort

"Cato?" I asked, turning on my side. His outline was illuminated by the lights of the capitol below.

"Yeah?" he replied, staring at the ceiling.

"Maybe Johanna's right. I mean, maybe a baby isn't the best idea right now. We could wait-"

"No." he said sternly, turning on his side, signaling the conversation was over. Still, Johanna's words rumbled in my ears like a bad song stuck in my head.

"Cato?"

"What!" he snapped with anger. He took a deep breath, turning back around so he could see me. "What?" he said softer.

"This boycotting the Hunger Games idea. Do you think it will work?" I paused. "Because if it doesn't, one of us will die. If I die, you'll be even more heartbroken with the loss of the child too-"

"That won't happen-"

"just let me finish. If you die, I'll have to raise a child on my own. It would just be best if both of us-"

He crushed his lips against mine. "No" he cupped my face. "We made it out last time, by the skin of our teeth, and we'll make it out this time. I promise."

"Don't make promises you can't keep." I whispered, a tear rolling down my cheek.

"Shhh, Clove. It's going to be okay. We'll get out of this." he pulled me closer and sighed.

* * *

"So Clove," Caesar Filckerman began. ", I hear a rumor that you are engaged, is it true?"

"Yes." I faked a laugh of surprise. "For a while now actually."

"Wow." he turned to the audience for a reply. They all oohed and ahhed. "Do you think you'll ever be Mrs. Cato?"

"I've always been Mrs. Cato. I've always belonged to him, from the moment we met and from the moment he first kissed me. We have an undeniable chemistry." I put sincerity into my voice.

"So, Clove, if by some miracle you both make it out of the Games, what will the future plans for Mr. and Mrs. Cato be?"

"Future plans are probably out of the question by now." I absentmindedly placed a hand on my stomach. "Because as soon as the Games are over, I'll have to raise the child on my own." There was a collective gasp from the audience. I looked back at the other victors. Some were shocked, some shook their head in disappointment, and others in spite.

"Wait, so you are pregnant? Clove and Cato are having a child?" Caesar asked. The crowd went wild.

"yes, Caesar, we are."

"Well that's all the time we have." Caesar kissed my hand. "Good to see you Clove, and good luck with the baby. May the odds be ever in your favor." I smiled sweetly and stood up, smoothing down my dress to cover my legs. I passed Cato and he pulled me towards him by the waist and kissed me. The crowd exploded. "Alright you two." Caesar said.

Cato sat in the chair, crossing his legs. "Fancy meeting you here Caesar."

The crowd laughed. "Nice to see you too. So Cato, if you can make it out of the games, do you think you will make a good father?"

"A good father?" Cato rubbed his chin. "It's hard to determine. I think with such a violent history, It'll take some getting used to, but Clove taught me how to love. And our son or daughter will teach me to love again."

"Well that's sweet. how do you plan to keep your fiance safe in the Games?"

"I'll do anything for her to make it out alive."

"Such bold words. Has an established career group been established yet?" Caesar asked.

"No." Cato replied. I knew it was a lie. So did everyone else. There were two obvious sides. Cato and I had gathered Johanna and Finnick and Madge as a small group. We had talked to some outlying districts about the boycotting idea, but they thought we would betray them. And the district one pair had decided to keep to themselves and plan their own bloodthirsty plan.

"Ah, I see."

* * *

"This is it." I said to Cato under my breath. "This is our last night of privacy, or comfort." we stood in the living room, Cato's arms wrapped around my waist and mine around his neck.

"I know." he whispered. "Try not to think about it." He kissed my forehead and I slid my hands down his chest, holding them there. I reached for the little box on the table and Cato looked at me with his pained expression. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Cato, the day I bring a child into this living hell, I won't be able to forgive myself. It's hard enough fighting for my own life, but two is just too many."

"I can't watch." he turned away.

"I'm sorry." my voice cracked. I pulled out the small yellow pill that would wipe away any evidence I had ever been pregnant. It would all go away. The baby would be lost. I swallowed the pill and took a big gulp of water. "It's done." I said under my breath. Cato nodded, walking to his bedroom and stoping before opening the door.

"Just give me some time before you come in." he opened the door and disappeared into it.

**CLove u idjit. **


	20. Guidelines

Chapter 20

Guidelines

That night, I didn't go into Cato's room. I know I should have. It was probably our last night to be worry free. Well, at least as worry free as a couple of careers could be. Instead, I went to my own room. It was cold and dark and made me feel worse than ever before. I laid down and started to cry for all the horrible things I had done, and not even morning could stop me from remembering the horrible things I was doing. I kept telling myself _it'll all pay_ off_ in the long run._ But there was something dying on the inside.

I woke up to the horrible churning in my stomach. The world was turning upside down. Oh god. I sprinted into the bathroom and threw up, again and again. Maybe it was part of the abortion meds. I wasn't sure, but the only thing I was sure of was that I felt like shit. "Rise and shine." I heard Haymitch's voice as he entered my room. In the next second, he was standing in the doorway. "Hangover?" he questioned, a smirk on his face.

"Shut up." I spat, standing up, wiping the back of my hand across my mouth and pushing past Haymitch.

"Last chance to say goodbye to baby daddy and then you'll be on your way to immediate death."

"SHut UP!" I shouted, watching as my hand cracked across the mentor's face. He stared at me incredulously and I almost expected a slap back.

"Nice hand you got there."

"Unbelieveable." I opened my door and stomped out into the hallway. Cato scooped me up, burying his face in my hair.

"I never thought I'd have to say goodbye again." he whispered in my ear.

"Only for now. I'll see you after the bloodbath." I replied.

"Yeah." he pulled back and kissed me one last time before Enobaria pulled us away, leading me off.

* * *

"Alright Clove, now heres your suit." Flo handed me a strange looking wet suit that I continued to put on. "Now good luck." she basically shooed me off.. I stepped onto the platform and the tunnel closed around me. Flo turned away from the tunnel looking a bit choked up. I rolled my eyes and the platform started to rise.

My heart started beating faster and my chest seized up. My breath staggered and the light took my eyes. I blinked a couple times, trying to see again. "5...4" I looked around at all the tributes in a circle. Platforms were above water and I could see the cornucopia right in front of me. Waves lapped beneath my feet and the only thought that was going through my head was, thank goodness we trained for this kind of thing at the training center. The numbers echoed in my skull. "3...2"

Cato was on the opposite side of the cornucopia, trying to communicate to everyone else. My nerves pulsed with electricity as Cato started to mouth words to me. _Go into the bloodbath and defend. Keep all the supplies you can. _"1" the horn sounded and about half of the tributes dove off their platforms. The other half was either paralyzed with fear, or the haunting realization that they couldn't swim. Johanna was one of them.

Finnick swam over to her platform and helped her off, almost drowning when she clung desperately to him. I finally dove off my platform, torpedoing through the water and feeling all the bubbles around me. For a moment it was quite peaceful. There were no shouts, no blood, no worries at all. But I snapped back to reality. I had a cornucopia to protect.

I sam in vain to the cornucopia where the bloodbath had already begun. Cashmere and Gloss went around Cato, who stood at the mouth of the cornucopia occupied with the tributes from eleven. They ducked into the cornucopia and started picking away at the supplies, realizing they had all the time in the world to be choosy.

I climbed up onto the sliver of land and hacked my way to the cornucopia, already feeling my body weaken. I ran past Cato, who noticed me and almost mistook me for another tribute, but let me by, and I hurled myself at Cashmere as she reached for the one thing I wanted; the knives.

I landed on Cashmere, who fell to the ground with a bone crunching sound and smiled. For a moment, I could remember last year's games, when I had almost don the same thing to Katniss. Almost. I reached around blindly for a weapon, anything to get Cashmere with, when the hand of Thresh fell on my back. No, not Thresh, but Gloss, lifting me off of Cashmere. Gloss flung me across the interior of the cornucopia and I grimaced We were wasting time. Underlying districts were getting supplies while I battled the pair from one.

A canon boomed in my head but I didn't give myself time to figure out who it was. I realized I was slumped against a box of ninja stars. I smiled to myself. Throwing ninja stars couldn't be that much different than knives, could it? I took them into my hand and hurled them at Gloss, one shredding through his arm, and the other through his leg, maybe even his femoral artery. My aim hadn't been soo great, but it was effective. My opponents were distracted and it gave me just the right amount of time.

I ran past Cashmere who was rushing to her partner's side, desperately trying to stop the bleeding. I picked up couple knives, suddenly jumping in front of Cashmere and Gloss. They were trying to make a run for it. Instead of keeping people out of the cornucopia, now I was keeping them in, with every bit of strength I had.

Cashmere stopped to curse a bit, but she knew I had the upper hand. I was armed and more prepared. It was fight or flight and I chose fight and they chose flight. "I can't let you leave."

"Clove-" Cashmere pleaded.

"No, you're not leaving."

"Bitch." Gloss muttered.

"Clove! Let them go! They're no real harm!" Finnick's voice echoed in the cornucopia.

"What?" I lowered my knives and just as I did, Cashmere ran Gloss out, disappearing into the forest.

"We're trying to keep the death tolls to a minimum." Finnick reminded me.

"If you don't recall, we're fighting to the death. Not attending a tea party." I retorted, wiping the grime from my forehead.

"That's three." Cato wiped the blood of his sword on his suit leg. "Out of pure self defense, though."

"Make that four." Johanna used the heel of her foot to wipe away the blade of her axe. "I really didn't like the girl from five."

**I know this was terrible . sorry**


	21. Stays The Same

**I know its been extremely long since I wrote. I was trying to get through exams and things have just been complicated and I had writers block so I didn't want to let you guys down by writing a crappy chapter. But I'm back and its summer so hopefully the stories will be more frequent.**

Chapter 21

Stays The Same

Johanna, after wiping the blood off the blade of her axe, continued past the rest of the career tributes. "What? Just gonna stand there?" and she ducked into the cornucopia. Finnick shook his head, following Johanna and then Mags decided to join them.

"Come on Clove, we should go help them." Cato said, but the sounds of his voice pounded in my head. My knees wobbled and I dropped to them, feeling like the world was unstable beneath my feet. Cato rushed to me in a blur as I supported myself with my legs and arms. I could feel the shortness of breath in my lungs and inhaled deeply. "Clove! Clove can you hear me?!" Cato"s voice, as well as his face, came into focus.

"Yeah, I hear you, I'm just-" I started to get up but my legs wobbled again. Cato slung his arms around me and suddenly, I was off the ground. Cato was carrying me. "I don't need to be carried Cato, I'm-" I winced as I drew in a breath. "-fine."

Cato ignored my pleads, carrying me into the cornucopia. The temperature of the arena was starting to get me as the adrenaline wore off. The heat wasn't as bad in the shade of the cornucopia. He set me down on the ground and I saw everyone gathering around, looking at me with strange expressions.

"What's wrong with her?" Johanna crossed her arms. "Hey! Clove!" she snapped in front of my face. I almost reached out to slap her hand away but I couldn't find the strength.

"Leave her alone." Surprisingly, Mags was the one who spoke. She knelt by my side, her brow creased. "She's sick."

"No shit." Johanna retorted.

"How do you mean sick" Cato knelt beside Mags and the world seemed to be going in and out of focus. I felt a cough rising in my chest and tried to turn over, but all energy was gone. I coughed and felt the blood gather in my throat, choking on it.

"Turn her over, she's choking!" Finnick insisted. Cato turned me to the side in haste. A drip of scarlett escaped my lips and pooling on the ground beneath me.

"Clove. What have you done?" Cato's voice sounded choked with sobs.

"I-" I began, before my body was taken over by a shudder of chills. I reached for Cato, who leaned closer before realizing what it was I wanted. Beads of sweat formed on my forehead at the slightest movement.

"Leave me alone with her for a sec guys." Cato peered up at the other members, who nodded and exited from the cornucopia. "Clove? What is it?"

"It's-" I took a rattling breath as Cato helped me to sit up. I lifted my arm with more effort than it should have taken and wiped my mouth with the back of my hand. "The medication."

"What?" Cato looked at me with a strange expression. "This isn't part of the meds? It's not supposed to do this though, right?"

I shook my head. "It's rejecting the meds. This-" I let out another ough and more blood dribbled down my chin. Heat consumed my body and sweat clung to my skin. "This one's a fighter." I placed my hand on my stomach and laughed, allowing more blood to appear.

Cato, seeming a bit teary eyed, moistened his lips. "But we have to stop it. If you're sick like this, how will we get you out of the games. I mean, there's got to be something we can do." Cato tried to reason.

"The medication-" I readjusted myself, leaning all my weight against Cao. "-isn't supposed to take full effect until 48 hours later."

'So we've still got time? We can reverse this and you won't be sick, right?"

I nodded. "If we could just figure out a way to get the medication out-"

"We could cut it out." Johanna shouted from outside.

"Eavesdropper!" Cato shouted, laughing to himself. "What if you heave it up. I mean, that's the most logical explanation, isn't it?" I nodded, feeling the sweat pouring down my back and neck. "Do you want me to stay?" Cato questioned.

"No, I'll do this myself."

* * *

I stared incredulously at the yellow pill that was supposed to end it all. Supposed to end this extra life, but instead, it almost ended mine. After seeing that pill escape my system without killing the fetus, I felt a strange sort of elation. Maybe I didn't want to get rid of the baby after all. Then again, this would cause a couple complications.

"Nothing we can't handle." Cato's voice replied my thoughts and I realized I had spoken out loud. He threw me an apple and I was surprised to see I had the energy to catch it. "You should eat something."

I took a bite of the apple, not feeling like eating much at that moment, but eating the apple anyway. "So, mama Clove." Johanna came back into the cornucopia along with the others. "I do believe we should start setting up camp, or are you _too weak_ for that?"

I was surprised to see Mags spraying water at Johanna's face. "Heyy!" Johanna shouted.

"Works on cats too." Mags grinned to herself.

"Alright you two, lets set up camp." Finnick offered. Cato helped me to stand up and I began milling about, using random objects as support every once in a while, but managing to help. By the time the sleeping bags were set up, the first night in the arena had begun to set in, and there was a somber silence among us careers. A small fire crackled with the sleeping bags in a circle around it. The gamemakers hadn't provided tents this year, and Johanna seemed to be happy about that. "At least we don't have to listen to you guys getting it on at night." Johanna had said.

"Yeah, you're right. You'll probably want to watch." Cato had replied. But all joking was over by now. We ate food in silence and I mulled over everything in my mind. Any choices about the baby I had made were reversed now. I was going to be a mother, if I lived that long. I was reminded of my life flashing before my eyes in las years games, with two children chasing each other around the house with knives and Cato sobbing on the kitchen floor.

One thing was for sure. If Finnick didn't pull through on his plan, Cato would live alone without any child, or I would be a single mother. Either way, I didn't want to find out what would happen. Cato slipped his hand into mine, tugging it towards one of the sleeping bags. I nodded and we both slipped inside, our bodies pressed closely to each other. I tucked my head beneath Cato's shin, spinning the ring on my finger. Everything had changed, yet everything was still the same.

**Please gimmie reviews!**


	22. Fears

Chapter 22

Fears

Daylight came with a persistent heat that trickled through my body. I zipped the sleeping bag open, feeling the heat next to Cato overly immense and the sleeping bag even worse. I threw the sleeping bag off me and Cato, obviously awakened by my movement, pulled me on top of him.

"Good morning." he mumbled.

"Morning." i replied, smirking.

"How are you feeling?"

"Good."

"The morning sickness back yet?" Cato questioned.

"Surprisingly, no."

"Good." he rolled us over so that we were in the sand instead of the sleeping bag. He propped himself up on his forearms so he wouldn't crush me with his weight and he buried his face in my hair. "Because I hate seeing you in pain."

"I hate being in pain." I mumbled.

"You won't be, as long as I'm here." Cato, with surprising gentleness, brushing his nose against mine, then his lips against mine. I bit my lower lips, stopping my gasps of pure relief from escaping my lips. It was such a relief to be with Cato like this. I wasn't thinking about the baby, or the arena. It was just Cato and I, alone in that moment.

"I love you." I whispered, as if to make sure no one else could hear me. That no one else could steal my love for Cato.

"I love you too." Cato rolled off of me and stood up, offering me his hand. "Come on." he whispered. "Let's go for a swim."

"Now?" I asked, taking his hand as he lifted me easily. We walked to the opening of the cornucopia, realizing it was dawn. None of the other tributes could be awake.

"Yeah, now." Cato nodded, picking up a sword just in case. I reached down for my knives, but he swiftly stepped between me and the knives. "You don't need to be doing anything. Plus, we're just going for a swim."

"If you get to take your sword, I get my knives. I'm pregnant, not incompetent." I retorted. Cato chuckled, still not stepping out of my way. "Cato." I warned, moving stealthily towards the knives. Cato was quicker. With one movement, he swept me up in one arm and draped me over his shoulder. At first I pounded on his back in anger and frustration, but it was only a matter of minutes before I was giggling like a teenager.

Cato continued away from the cornucopia to the waterside, setting me back on the ground, as well as his sword. "Come on." he smiled, taking my hand. We waded out into the water until Cato could touch, but I couldn't. He picked me up so that I could wrap my legs around his waist. "Shouldn't we be worried about poisonous water creatures or something?" I asked.

"No." Cato replied with a whisper, brushing his lips across the exposed skin on my neck. "Stop talking, Clove." I obliged, drawing a hand up to ruffle his hair. His lips trailed up my neck, along my chin, my cheekbone, my nose, and then my mouth. At first it was a light sweep across the lips, but it turned into something more. He pressed his lips against mine harder and harder, exploring my mouth, not that he needed to. He knew every part of me as well as the back of my hand. His hand trailed up my back to the zipper on my wet suit-like outfit.

"Cato!" I gasped, stopping his hand midway down my back. "We're on TV"

"They'll give us privacy, I promise." Cato didn't sound so sure, but I told myself to ignore it. I hadn't been this happy in a while, I wouldn't let my insecurity change that. Cato walked into deeper water so it was up to our necks and nothing below was invisible. Cato's hands still worked at the zipper while his lips trailed across my collar bones, placing small purple bruises here and there. I allowed a sigh to escape my lips.

I heard a low, feral growl, and Cato jerked away from me. "Was that you?" I asked.

"No, I thought it was you?" Cato replied. His hands expertly pulled my zipper all the way back up. Cato looked down at the watch he had found in the cornucopia. "It's five o'clock. None of the other tributes could possibly be up right now."

But the feral growl came again. I looked around wildly, holding myself close to Cato's body. "we need to get to the sword." Cato ordered, rushing out of the water with me in tow. The feral growl sounded again. He picked up his swords and we walked with faster paces to the cornucopia, but Cato hit a wall. An invisible wall.

One minute he was walking, the next there was a thud and he was on the ground, rubbing his forehead. "What the-" he pushed towards the air again and some invisible force trapped his hand still. "They gated us in?"

"What? No. That can't be right, we were just in the cornucopia." I tried to reason. The growl was closer and a figure appeared out of the early morning shadows. A figure I would never forget. The mutations from last years games, and in it, were Katniss's eyes, raking my body hungrily. "Cato-" I stopped, my voice taken by fear. The mutation lingered closer, obviously aware we couldn't escape.

"Get behind me, Clove." Cato insisted, standing in front of me with the sword. At the same moment, the mutation lunged towards Cato and I wasn't sure if I screamed or some other thing screamed. There was no telling what you heard in the arenas.

The mutation pounced on Cato and pinned him to the ground, his sword skidding off. I ran to retrieve the sword and another mutation appeared, pinning me to the ground. It's paws dug my shoulders into the sand and it's haunches poised themselves around my legs so that I couldn't move. not without being ripped to shreds first.

The mutation snarled, a drop of drool escaping its lips. The acrid smell of its breath was overwhelming, and made me a bit queasy. But as the mutation snarled, it looked straight into my eyes, confused. I shook its head and I could swear I saw the image flicker like a hologram, but this mutation was indefinably solid by the way it's paws pressed all its weight onto my shoulders.

But the image flickered again and for a moment, it wasn't a mutation at all. It became my father for a moment, then an image of Cato dying right before my eyes, then it was a small boy/girl, flickering between the two that looked like it could have been my child, except for the fact that bruises were prominent against their face, and blood trailing from cuts. The images split, a boy and a girl, both easily identified as what could be Cato and I's children. And right before my eyes, I could see the kids grow to twelve, at least, and then turning to each other, slaughtering each other.

The image flickered for another moment and returned to a mutation, then my father, and flickering between all my greatest fears. Little did I know I would have to watch my greatest fears occur before my eyes until it was 6 o'clock, but even then I couldn't escape my biggest fears.

**reviews please! IMPORTANT NOTE: if you are interested in reading any of my original works, I have posted an original work (not a fanfic) on fiction press and wattpad, both under the same username as this one on fanfic. I'd love to have some people check it out. thanks! **


	23. Black

**I was at the beach for three weeks sorry i havent writen. and i have a camp starting tomorrow and then ill be back within computer range for three days then back to the ebach again so sorry about all the delays :( i hope you guys still love me :P**

Chapter 23

Black

The sun was peaking over the cornucopia, visible in the distance when it was six. The holograms flashed and disappeared and it was like nothing had happened earlier, but Cato and me were wrecked. We both lay a couple yards away, shaking from fear. For the first time in ages I could see Cato, a broken boy, crying and drawing his knees to his chest. He almost looked like the teenager he actually was.

When the holograms disappeared, I let out a gasp, not knowing I had been holding my breath. I laid in the stillness for a long time, trying to get my heart rate down and stop the tears, but they just kept coming. Finally, I let my walls down and let out a soul ripping, psychologically wrecked scream that reverberated through the arena. There was no physical damage, but my mind was forever scarred.

Cato and I laid quivering for a good hour until Finnick, Mags, and Johanna came running from the cornucopia, searching for us frantically. When they saw us, they all were shell shocked for a moment. Mags reached down and picked me up, surprisingly strong for a woman of her age, and carried me back to the cornucopia, covering me in blankets. I cried myself to sleep and dreamt about all the horrible things I had just seen.

I kept telling myself

_th_ey're _not real_

_they're not real_

_they're not real_

but they were. You cant unlove your greatest love, you cant unlive your greatest moment, and you cant unsee your greatest fears.

* * *

When I woke up out of a nightmarish haze, i found the cornucopia empty and eerily quiet. I blinked my eyes at the opening at the cornucopia and realized it was dark. I pushed back the sleeping bag, now drenched with sweat. I took a shaky breath and looked around me.

The walls in the cornucopia looked like a big mouth, swallowing you whole. They stretched above me, barely shinning in the faint moonlight. I was lying on top of some boxes, filled with who knows what. My blanket had fallen to the ground beneath me. Next to me was a glass of water, untouched and what I assumed to be meant for me.

I drank it in a couple gulps and slid down from the boxes, quivering on my legs before continuing to walk. Cato's sleeping bag was just as empty as mine was now. I reached down and picked up the bag, realizing it was no longer warm from body heat. Cato had been gone for a while.

I decided to take a peak outside to see if that's here everyone had gone. I drug my swollen feet to the opening of the cornucopia and paused, leaning against the metal enclosure.

Out in front of me was an empty beach, waves lapping the shore and moonlight beaming off the water. I slid down the side of the cornucopia, glancing over the water and enjoying the peace for a moment. For what seemed like minutes but in reality was hours, I watched the waves, inching forward and receeding back.

"Tributes-" a voice boomed. I jumped, clutching at my chest instinctively where my heart was now beating faster. "We are here to announce the lost ones in the events of this day-" I let my head drop back so I could see the sky. Across the fake stars flashed images of tributes from six, seven, and twelve. Probably more, but I wasn't sure. In total, eight had died that day. I placed my palm on the ground when silence returned and stood up, taking one last glance at the water and just coming barely out of the mouth of the cornucopia.

And then there was a flash of movement, the sound of my own screaming, a hand over my mouth, and a knife to my throat. "Don't move-" Gloss grimaced, nicking the skin of my neck with the blade. "Wouldn't want to kill little baby clove, now would you?" a dark hand trailed down and patted my belly followed by the hiss of someone shhhhing me. Another hand covered my nose and I blacked out.

**i know it kind of sucked sorry guys im a little rusty**


End file.
